Remember me... I'm in da-da-da-danger.

MIGRATE

2012-02-19T14:00:00.000+08:00

This blog has migrated to http://heartintheshadow.blogspot.com . Thanks.

death doesn't like to be cheated

2011-08-28T18:03:00.003+08:00

At long last. I've watched Final Destination 5 in cinemas, and twice in 3D! :D

mistakes

2011-08-10T11:33:00.002+08:00

These tears, these fears
Unsettling as they come
Some things I can never overcome

That smile, feels like a mile
That strong fear of believing
The very obstacle to living

It really hurts, those words
The pain you can never feel
Those scars that will never heal

Rejection, deception
Does it have to be a must
To learn from scratch, again, just how to trust

Breaking it, taking it
Falling into that pit of sorrow
Just feels like there's no tomorrow

Footsteps, heart stabs
Those times of bliss
Those times I miss

The grief, the eventual drift
I was happy, then
I could be happy, when?

It could be, maybe it was just me
The darkness that shrouds
Even in the massive crowd

Breaking apart, in the heart
It used to be a part
Now it is only apart

Those tears, those fears
They could never stop
They could never, stop.

Final Destination 5

2011-08-10T11:29:00.000+08:00

OMG WHEN IS IT COMING OUT!!!! I'M DYING IN ANTICIPATION!

losing grip

2011-06-17T11:08:00.002+08:00

I've been lazy and pretty incoherent with my blog updating, but there are just so many thoughts I have and sometimes I just can't find the right words to list them all down, and sometimes I just don't feel like doing so.

I'm guilty for always keeping my thoughts inside of me and just bottling up the emotions, one after another. I don't know when this bottle of emotions will crack and shatter from overflow, but I can feel the pressure. I don't even know how to release my emotions anymore, and I may be starting to lose my ability to cry it out.

This pain in my heart, is not just another ordinary pain. It's worse than the scars you get physically; these emotional scars continue to burn day by day and the flame can always be reignited several years down the road, just so that you feel the pain again.

It is a pain of heartbreak, something which I thought I wouldn't have to face again. Something which I had so strongly believed it, but it has failed me 4 times. I hate how that number will only increase and leave a mark as I try to move on.

It is a pain of feeling other people's heartbreak, when I see others around me crumble. I hate myself for being so sensitive sometimes, such that I can feel how others feel, and sometimes it is because of this that I somehow want others to be able to appreciate my feelings too, which never really happens.

I just feel like a fool in life. A fool that will never learn. A fool that will continue to trust people even though he has been hurt many times before. A fool that will give in to whatever people want and not live for himself. A fool that can give people great advice and help them move on, but is stuck at the very same place he was left behind. A fool in believing what is fact or fiction.

I tried.

moving on

2011-05-29T18:08:00.001+08:00

I never thought this day would come, and come so quickly. It's time. Maybe you were never meant to be. But I never regret the decision I made on 24 January 2009.

over you

2011-05-07T02:55:00.002+08:00

Now that it's all said and done, I can't believe you were the one, to build me up then tear me down. I never saw it coming. I should have started running, a long, long time ago. I'm slowly getting closure, guess it's really over, and I'm finally getting better. Now I'm picking up the pieces, spending all of these years, putting my heart back together. The day I thought I'll never get through, I got over you.

hurry up

2011-04-16T10:06:00.000+08:00

Come on...I'm waiting for so many things!

don't matter

2011-02-12T08:36:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I wish decisions in life didn't have consequences.

give me a reason to smile

2011-01-29T02:34:00.002+08:00

Things are going terribly wrong every possible way it can be. Just when I thought the worst had hit me, even more terrible news swept me off my feet like tsunami waves. I don't see a point in doing this any longer. I wish my tears would change something, something for the better.

I don't wish to cry myself to sleep every night anymore. I need a reason to hang on. And I'm tired of masking my emotions under a smile.

I'm not as happy as you think I am or I am perceived to be. There's no reason to smile anymore. It's useless; it's hopeless; it's meaningless. It's gone.

keep holding on

2010-12-12T18:13:00.002+08:00

I know how strong you have been, and how much you have tried not to show your disappointment, misery or pain in front of me. I know. I do know.

Don't give up. You are stronger than you think and you are so much better than what it seems like right now... :)

lonely no more

2010-11-20T13:14:00.003+08:00

I don't want to have to just imagine your face or see your face on my iTouch. I want to see you in person... I don't want to cry any longer just missing you so terribly.

I don't want to be lonely no more. I just want you by my side. Will you return to my side?

i miss everything about you

2010-11-20T13:08:00.002+08:00

Why do we always only cherish things after they're gone? It just seems like we'll always be waiting for something, whether it is waiting to relive yet another moment that we once had or waiting for something to end so that the pain no longer stays...

I can't shake this aching feeling in my heart that I have for you. I hate having to keep wondering if you are ok. I just want to see your face and know that you are ok. I miss the times we were together, side by side. I really hope time will fly by, because that is the only way we can get through this now...

I miss you.

3 words say it all

2010-10-09T16:58:00.002+08:00

I saw this graffiti on the bus one day. I never thought it would strike me so hard thinking about it.

broken-hearted

2010-10-02T12:54:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I really have no idea why life has to be so cruel. When times get hard, all I really wish is to have someone physically by me to provide me with the support that I need, yet when I finally get what I've been longing for for 18 whole years, separation is inevitable. Fuck that.

I don't understand how it is so easy for others to move on. I'm still in the midst of recuperation and trying to stand up by myself. And my heart really aches by the day seeing how much suffering one can actually be subjected to and how unfair this world can be to those who have tried their best time and over again. My heart bleeds from not being able to rely on the support I need whenever I'm feeling down. I don't understand why time has to be a factor in deciding when support comes.

I've been crying too much thses days, yet my 'too much' just doesn't seem sufficient to ease any of the pain I'm feeling. I wish I could do the same things. I wish I could change everything, because I'll give anything for it. I wish this would be over.

just almost...

2010-06-20T13:25:00.003+08:00

I can't express how relieved I am to be actually out in the civilian world right now. Just about 2 days ago I was probably crying my ass out at the thought of being confined for one whole goddamn week just because I didn't manage to pass my IPPT. And yes, if it helps, that failure was a huge blow too.

I had always worked hard to try to achieve what I want, but it never really seemed to pay off very often. I've probably stayed in camp longer than anyone else, simply because I can't escape the fate of two dreadful words -- RT. It sucks to be me I know, but sometimes I wish that my fate would change too. And I've made the effort to try to change it.

I wish someone could understand my pain.

army daze

2010-06-05T09:09:00.003+08:00

Woah. It seems like ages since I last updated my blog. It almost died and faded away but at least I'm still making an effort to keep it alive now with whatever civilian time I have left, especially this dreadful week.

I guess army life really makes me appreciate all that I have. The precious civilian time with absolute freedom on what to eat and when to eat (read: very important), what to wear, how to walk (read: no marching in cadence) etc. It really shocks me how much I've taken for granted, and I realized this through the hard way when I was in field camp just the third week of enlistment. Oh yes, and if there was any consolation, we started off from week ZERO. Yes. Zilch, nada, zero... Whatever you call it.

Being outfield isn't exactly the kind of thing you'll ever want to do again, but there isn't much of a choice anyway. Mud everywhere. On your boots. On your uniform. Even on your food. I don't really care anymore.

I never thought I would survive army. But I'm enjoying it right now. All the physical and mental fatigue is just part of growing up...

finally breathing

2010-04-17T11:36:00.002+08:00

I can't believe how relieved I'm actually feeling this time round to be finally finished with my job. I remember how I felt the very last time I was unemployed. Maybe this will teach me a lesson not to be so kancheong in searching for a job and to actually look properly before signing that contract. Harsh. And anyway, I just can't believe people of authority so love to abuse their position and react in a way that is just emotionally immature. I hate politics.

Anyway, never judge a book by its cover, so never judge a movie by its trailer. Once again, the movie sucks when its trailer just looks so damn good! The latest instalment "Ju-On: White Ghost & Black Ghost" was just disappointing. I'm sure the directors could do a better job of creating a better sequel instead of just throwing out a sequel for the sake of it, especially since Ju-On is an established name for original plot sequences and genuine scares. There were just so many I-have-seen-this-gimmick-before scenes. The plot doesn't make sense. And some scenes were just laugh out loud funny, judging by how loudly the cinema erupted in laughter. There was even a scene where the girl was writhing in the floor in a fit when someone in the cinema commented "Breakdancing sia." That was damn funny hahahaha.

And. I have no idea when I've really become this K-Pop fanatic, but it seems to be that recently a hell lotta people have caught onto this Korean wave bug and all of a sudden everyone's downloading Korean songs and watching Korean dramas etc. And guess what? I'm crazy enough to actually start learning the Korean language myself. Well, a new language doesn't hurt.

To be honest, I'm kinda scared for what's to come in the army. It's the fear of the unknown that's often the scariest. And I'm not exactly the fittest guy out there, so I have alot to suffer I reckon. Wish me luck in the army! Damn. 28th April...

the end is nigh

2010-03-31T12:10:00.002+08:00

Funny thing about work is, I kinda got used to it, even though I'm not supposed to.

And I'm not dumb. I know that condescending look on your face. So what if you are filthy rich adn could probably crush me with all your stacks of green? It doesn't make me less of a human so you can just kiss your cash when you are in your coffin.

What the hell man. Stop tapping on the damn glass window. Be patient and wait. Didn't your parents teach you some manners? Where has all that education you spent with your tons of cash gone to? What are you - woodpecker?

And bloody fuck. I mean, I was a new part-timer who was lost and just needed a helping hand. How many people actually offered that helping hand? I guess karma will get you indeed. I'm kinda glad I will never have to face someone so high and almighty about himself and so rude and sarcastic to tell me to "Keep it up" when I'm lost.

But I guess there's a silver lining to every cloud, whatever that idiom is. There will always be someone out there whom you will have fun interacting with, despite coming from different worlds.

Still, I think I'm glad my work is coming to an end. Too much to take and swallow. And anyway, I don't wish to get involved in conflicts between people. I hate it.

remnants of the tears shed

2010-03-12T16:10:00.002+08:00

I think I'm school-sick. It's times like these when you really start to miss school and hanging out with all your friends there. It's when you come out to work that you realize that you are no longer able to go back to that classroom which you have lived and breathed in for a few years. It also means that mistakes are no longer as easily forgiven.

Yes. Doomsday came and gone. I did ok, but I have alot to say, not in terms of general perspective, but in comparison to everyone else in the school. Everyone else who has had their results slip filled with a plentiful supply of As, please learn to shut up, go back to your house and smile foolishly to yourself while looking at the bright future you have ahead of you. Sorry, but you rubbing in your fantastic results kinda just pisses me off.

I broke down. Yes. I did. Upon seeing my GP results, then my Japanese results. Fruits of the labour. What bullshit. After so much effort and disappointing results? I have nothing to say. Anyway, the GP results was the breaking point.

And I never knew a teacher could be so heartless to a crying student.

Now I just hope I get into my choice of course for university. Hopefully a scholarship too.

state of confusion and panic

2010-03-05T10:02:00.002+08:00

I've been crazy and lost these 2 weeks. Last week I was living my life one day behind, thinking that Monday was Sunday, Tuesday was Monday etc. This entire week I've been living my life one day ahead, thinking Monday was Tuesday, Tuesday was Wednesday etc. My entire calendar is screwed up. And the sweltering heat of the erratic weather now is not helping at all.

I can't believe that in just a few hours, I'll be getting back this slip of paper that will essentially determine how my future is like. I rather live in ignorance. Ignorance is bliss, isn't it? I'm breaking out into cold sweat just thinking about what could possibly happen if, touchwood, I do badly. Rather, what could possibly not happen since bad results will only shut more doors to your future.

Anyway, I finally met up with my long-lost friend of 12 years, Nicholas, yesterday! Talk about damn long... It was great, but I wasn't being myself. How to, when I'm in this horrendous fluster thinking about my results. We visited the soon-to-be-torn-down campus of Montfort Sec and gosh, it was OLD. DAMN OLD. AND EMPTY.

Argh. I'm getting myself all cranked up thinking about my results. And my work as a waiter starts tomorrow. And I still have alot of friends to meet up. And I'm going to be enlisted soon.

WHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY.

scared is an understatement...

2010-03-02T12:37:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I have no idea how to describe how I'm feeling now. This Friday will be the doomsday which every 18-year-old fears. Ok, some 19-year-olds for that matter as well.

I'll probably be really quiet on that day before I get back that slip that kinda determines my whole future ahead. My last certification was PSLE, and god, that is never gonna get me anywhere. I swear. Who cares what you scored in primary school?

Dang. I don't exactly have a good feeling, but I don't know what to expect anyway. I have no idea whether I will do well (which is unlikely, by the way) or I will screw it up damn badly. More like the latter, as much as I'm wishing it won't happen. Damn. I should have been smarter. And more hardworking.

Anyway, I miss LAN. Left 4 Dead 2 or Call of Duty 4... Anything. It is a good stress reliever.

i'm hooked. it's official.

2010-02-24T11:53:00.002+08:00

LAN rocks. I'm totally hooked up to a new game I just tried out. Left 4 Dead 2 is damn freaking cool. Shooting all the zombies but it's damn gory. Innards and blood splatter all around, and that's just the mild factor.

Anyway the witch is irritating. I keep startling it, but sometimes on purpose so that I can try killing it. But more often than not, I go down and then get mobbed by zombies trying to stomp me to death. Not bad for people who are already half dead. Or dead for that matter. And I hate tank. That huge gigantic monster keeps attacking me. What the. I keep losing health because of that.

Whatever. I'm hooked. I need to play it again haha. AND OMG A GIRL LANS TOO. Nothing gender-stereotypical here but I thought girls generally don't like shooting. And zombies too. Oh well. I can LAN with her. Haha. :D

12 years... and back!

2010-02-23T10:14:00.002+08:00

OMG. Crazy shizz. I never expected such a huge surprise upon opening my inbox after just an absence from Facebook for about a week. I've apparently been tagged in a primary 1 photo by one of my ex-schoolmates! And suddenly I found hell lotta my primary 1 schoolmates on Facebook!

And hell, alotta people changed. Ok, this sounds close to ironic coming from the person who has most probably changed the most in terms of looks and character blah. Honestly, I don't think anyone would be able to recognize me on the streets. So if I go back to my primary school I'll probably get arrested for trespassing or something. Haha.

Anyway, it's good to see everyone back again. Nostalgic huh...

Sigh sigh. I can totally feel how it is like to be unemployed. Considering that I have only 2 months to offer before I enlist into the army, I'll really be lucky to get a job... My fingers are crossed.

after such a long while...

2010-02-13T10:24:00.001+08:00

This blog was just about to go stale, but I revived it.

It feels weird. Everyone graduated and moved on with their lives. It's just weird to see everyone move on and take on jobs that you'll probably never imagine them taking on. People at ice-cream shops, cafes, schools, paper shops, mobile shops... Everywhere. It's funny thinking how just a few months ago everyone was in school studying together.

And I never imagined myself doing sales. Telemarketing in fact... Of course, I learnt that I probably wouldn't like sales that much, if you get what I mean. Getting scolded by customers would be just another daily routine, and if that doesn't make you feel like shit, I don't know what will. Even if it's not your fault, you get blamed. Some customers can make your day, but some just make you feel like you shouldn't even exist in this world.

Whatever. I think it was a good experience overall. Stuff that you'll need next time, you learn it now. Better now than later, I reckon. I won't regret my taking on this job. Besides, I earned some incentives anyway. And what's bad about earning over $1K in just a span of 1-2 months?

I wanna take up driving too, but I don't have the time to. I'm just about to take on another job, of which I'm still waiting for the day of the interview to be confirmed. BTW DID YOU KNOW BOTH KENNETH AND TROY GOT THEIR DRIVING LICENSES!!!! Imba. And Kenneth drove us around town the other day we met up. Crazy stuff.

It kinda sucks to have almost all your dudes enlisted, and here you are still stuck in the real world. Earning money. Dealing with people. Missing all your friends because you know you will most probably not see them again.

If this is the expense of growing up, I rather not grow up. I wanna stay young, and innocent. I wish I didn't know that much.

more trailers!

2009-10-02T15:23:00.003+08:00

Looks interesting but not sure about the supernatural element...

Nice. I can always do with a classic Disney movie. :)

Lol I think this is a Thai movie. Looks spastic but funny. LOL.

Okay, looks pretty interesting.

Looks really good. But it's M18. Guess I'll wait...

Witty stuff. Haha I wanna watch it man! :)

Not bad at all! Haha. Looks above average...

OMG the girl look totally like Katy Perry! And I really wanna watch this! :D

Hot new movie! But it's coming out so close to 'A' Levels. *sigh*

Looks super cool! I wanna watch this too, if money permits...

accidental instances

2009-09-29T09:58:00.002+08:00

Ahh. Finally I'm updating my blog as per normal. Actual entries about life. LOL. It's time, after such a long break to study for Prelims, but I'm most probably gonna go on another blog-break to study for 'A' Levels. OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S SO NEAR! >.<

Anyway, I went out with Zhi Wei yesterday to chill out and relax. We watched the movie "Accident", which was pretty mediocre, but weird. I don't exactly know why but I thought the movie was kinda weird. Still, it was not bad I guess. I thought this kinda seemed like a Chinese version of the Final Destination though, with all the Rube Goldberg chain reactions leading to deaths. The deaths were in fact murders staged to look like accidents. Good premise but not-that-good plot and portrayal of the premise. Oh well...

I can't wait to watch "Phobia 2" in just a few hours! Woohoo! Another movie to make me jump out of my seat! Cool... :D

tell me if you do not laugh at this

2009-09-29T09:15:00.002+08:00

OMG this is what got me laughing for 7 MRT stations uncontrollably. HAHAHAHA... I especially love the first one though. HAHAHA. AND I BET THE VOICES OF CHARLIE'S FRIENDS WERE GUYS IN FALSETTO! Heh.

videos!

2009-09-29T09:00:00.002+08:00

Even Harry Potter is gay? First Dumbledore then now Harry? Hmm...

Hahaha. "Fuck you Kanye. Oops I'm getting ahead." Hahaha HILARIOUS. Kanye is a total jackass. Like Obama said it, jackass. Retire dude. No one cares about the 8os and heartbreaks anymore. And the host is a total DIVA. "Favourited!" HAHAHAHA. XD

Here's the original video.

You go girl Taylor! Everyone loves you more! :D

Erm, whatever happened to love?

Umm, the groan was just... WEIRD. LOL.

Looks sooooo wrong. But the guy's dumb too. -.-

LOL.

Classic bimbos. Tusks? Tsk.

the ultimate discovery of the century

2009-09-23T10:15:00.001+08:00

I thought all Japanese people were supposed to be punctual, friendly, helpful, warm, inviting, respectful, diligent and most importantly, nice? Well, apparently I've found a new species (or maybe just that one) who serves to dispute whatever stereotypes (read: good stereotypes) about Japanese people. Trust me, I have nothing against Japanese people; I like them in fact. Just not that one little thing.

Maybe I should send out a letter to the Science Research Centre or something to notify them of the discovery of the existence of this odd unidentifiable object claiming itself to be a Japanese! The horror. It is potentially damaging to the people around it and actions should be taken.

I need to do something. As if I can anyway. -.-

new trailers and even more movies to watch!

2009-09-23T09:25:00.002+08:00

Aww. Such a romantic show... It looks cool though.

Looks like another B-grade horror flick where chicks die. Prank, accidental death, revenge, killer on the loose... Everything AND hot girls. LOL.

OMG this looks genuinely scary. Cliche it may seem, but all the scares with a new touch from the directors. 5 stories, 5 different scares. I hope this is good! :)

This cartoon is much smater than it looks. Love the dark humour! :D

Another 'Final Destination' movie, this time in Chinese? Seems like it has potential though...

Yet another apocalyptic movie when the doomsday strikes. The concept is real but the way the movie depicts... I'm not that sure but it looks like a good watch.

Another dance flick! This one looks more subtle but more motivational. Good stuff!

NICE. The line between reality and deception becomes even unclear-er in this sci-tech movie! I wanna watch it!

As usual, I wanna watch it but most likely it's R21. What are the chances?

I WANNA WATCH THIS!!! It looks so awesome. One of the most inspirational stories ever! :D

Anything that falls into Michael Moore's hands turn into magic. Yet another great film. What can I say?

This is either a great concept holding up a mirror to society or just another flick-wannabe. It's a make-or-break one. I hope it's good! :D

some of the coolest commercials ever!

2009-09-23T09:00:00.003+08:00

I don't know what got me hooked up to these commercials, but they're rocking cool! :D

Hmm... Eyebrows and chocolate?

CLASSIC. Makes everyone in the world smart.

Ouch. But scientifically wrong (read: this is coming from an arts student).

Fight back! Now this makes more sense. LOL.

Ouch again. I can see why this is not released.

This is damn cool! WHY IS IT BANNED?!

Nice one. Haha. The guys took the show man!

AHAHAHAHA. Nice sequel! :D

The Final Destination is out! :D

2009-08-27T13:48:00.002+08:00

Even more TV spots! These are totally cool man! :D

And one death sequence is revealed...

fighting for what i want

2009-08-25T17:32:00.005+08:00

OMG can you believe it? Just 2 more days to the theatrical release of The Final Destination! :D :D

Anyway, I can't believe what I did. I actually sent e-mails to MDA to inquire about the fact that The Final Destination was rated R21 and even shamelessly asked if the rating could be lowered to M18 or even NC16. The MDA guy decided to call me since he figured that anything he typed in the e-mail might lead to confusion and I could ask him any questions on the spot too. Omg I can't tell you how nice he was! :) He was so patient and detailed in his explanation, as to why it's rated R21 at first because of the sex scene inside. However, the distributors realized that the main premise of this show wasn't about sex but about how Death comes back to claim the lives of those who cheated Death, hence decided upon a commercial decision. That is, the entire sex scene was removed and given an M18 rating instead for gore content.

THANK YOU! :D :D Okay, so my life is saved now. And my crisis doesn't seem all too bad now. But age wise... Hmm. I thank Alvin Lim beforehand first, for whatever reason I think if you are smart enough you should be able to guess. I won't say it explicitly, for whatever reasons or trouble I may land myself into.

Wish me luck kae in my venture on friday! Amin, I can't wait to watch the movie and I know you are dying to watch it too! It's the final instalment and in 3D! Let's enjoy the finale for our favourite hit series! :D

Meanwhile, some coolio pictures. Haha. :D

MY LIFE IS GONE

2009-08-21T13:35:00.000+08:00

I no longer have to do a countdown. The only countdown I'll be doing is to Prelims and 'A' Levels.

THE FINAL DESTINATION IS OFFICIALLY RATED A FREAKIN' R21 FOR SEXUAL SCENES AND GORE. FUCK.

Who the fuck wants to watch people have sex in this movie?! That's not the main point of this movie! I hate this world. Not even a simple wish like this?!

And to that bloody idiot, FUCK YOU. It's not funny.

My life is gone. I don't see any point in it anymore.

the grudge lives on

2009-08-21T13:00:00.000+08:00

Disclaimer: This is pretty disturbing and scary. Please do not watch it if you are the type who will have nightmares.

confucius and confuse us

2009-08-20T15:57:00.014+08:00

We sat down for a little story from the book of Dr. Seuss for assembly yesterday. Yes, we did indeed. Lol. Our deputy headmaster decided to read us something from it to start off his presentation, which was basically about preparing for the 'A' Levels. Agh. I've always feared these 2 words. I knew I would have to face it sooner or later (sooner I mean). Still, it was funny, for the fact that I felt like I was a primary school kid all over again listening to an adult reading me a story. HAHA.

Lol. This school is really making me laugh out whatever laughing sense I still have in me. A little brainless, but still makes for much fun. LOL.

Mr Ali: "What's the joke, Fiona? Tell me. I want to hear."
Fiona: (laughing uncontrollably) "No, it's ok. Never mind."
Mr Ali: "Why not? If you can tell a Malay the joke, why can't you tell an Indian?"

Mr Kamal: (while marking attendance) "Jian Ying, are you back yet?"
Jian Ying: "Here."
Mr Kamal: "You're back! So how was your waterpolo competition?"
Jian Ying: "Ok lah, we didn't win. We screwed up."
Mr Kamal: "Which countries were you against?"
Jian Ying: "Japan, Kuwait, Qatar..."
Mr Kamal: "Wah, you all lost to Kuwait ah? Those people from the desert can swim better?"

Mr Kamal: "Why do students go to New Zealand to study? What do they study there?"
Fiona: "Farming?"

Sham: "Do you have 'apparition' notes?"
Zhi Wei: "Yea. Oh my god, you sound like you're learning how to do apparition."

Sham: "My friend is a beautiful woman. I'm sure she could sneak the both of us in (to the ice-cream buffet without the coupon for an offer) by flirting or something. I mean, I could do that too but I just don't want to."
-- me laughing hysterically --
Sham: "What? I could, you know."

Sham: (referring to Qing Yu's blue contact lenses) "Let me see."
-- looks into Qing Yu's eyes --
Sham: "Wow. You're so beautiful I wanna look into your eyes."

And here are a few quotes (i.e. funny quotes) from Confucius. Totally made me laugh my heart out. HAHA.

1. "Man who cuts self while shaving, loses face."
2. "Man who leaps off cliff, jumps to conclusion."
3. "Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient."
4. "He who puts face in fruit drink, gets punch in the nose."

And yes, our GP tutor was pretty bored during the lesson when we were listening to the Chinese rap about Confucius. So this came about:

Gosh, my brain cells. Someone save them.

the first cut is the deepest

2009-08-20T15:37:00.003+08:00

Okay, so this is not the first time I actually cut myself by accident, which makes it even dumber. -.-

So, the dumb story was about me when I was trying to cut something. Apparently I dropped my scissors and as I was picking it up, I wasn't looking where my hand was reaching for. And so, my scissors decided to swing out in full blade without my realization and as I grabbed the scissors closer, the blades made 2 deep slashes across my thigh. -.- Yes, I know. Stupid right? Gosh.

Moral of the story: Look before you do something. Or else something else drastic can happen. This time it won't just be a cut (or two).

Here is my aftermath:

new "The Final Destination" tv spots!

2009-08-18T14:18:00.002+08:00

Coolio! Hahaha. Enjoy. Discretion is advised.

Yepp, that's all. So enjoy the new scenes that are unveiled through these TV spots that weren't in the official trailer! :D

10 is the magical number

2009-08-17T14:31:00.004+08:00

10 more days. Yes, just 10 more days to the release of The Final Destination in cinemas. I wonder if there's anyone else in the world eagerly waiting for the release of this movie too.

I'm SO SO SO excited! I've seen so much publicity for it around too! Movie posters at bus-stops, on websites etc! Yay they are promoting the movie. Guess it's a really popular franchise huh? Hahaha. Anyway, yes I've already arranged to watch the movie on 27 August with Amin. Yes the day of release itself. I can't wait already. I'm dying in anticipation, get it? Lol. I know it's near the Prelims, but if I don't watch it then, I would have to wait until after the Prelims, and by then the movie might not be screening already.

Many people define 'crisis' as technological breakdown, getting hit by natural disasters etc. I define 'crisis' as not being able to watch my favourite movie franchise. You should know by now that I'm OBSESSED with the Final Destination series. Yes, I confess. Please please please please pray for me that it is rated NC16 because I'm so tired of having to crash the gate for rated movies. I want to watch it with a piece of mind, and in 3D! OMG.

By the way, here's a little obsession... Check out the posters and the publicity! So cool right? XD

where got ghost?

2009-08-17T14:24:00.002+08:00

It seemed so weird, how the 7th month (i.e. Ghost month on the Chinese calendar) is about to come and our clique seemed to talk more and more about horror stories and horror films.

Today's conversation between me, Zhi Wei, Pei Khee and Yu Xin served as sufficient evidence. We were all talking about all the ghostly incidents we saw on TV as well as the horror films etc. hmm, not exactly advisable huh, since the 7th month is just so near.

Lol. You know I used to have this image that the ghosts would all camp at the gates of Hell every time this period and wait eagerly for the gates to be opened, following which they would all run out like small little kids excited to enter a playground. These ghosts would then float to their respective haunts and terrorize all the people there annually. Okay, yes I do have a vivid imagination, and sometimes this can get kind of irritating.

I guess this is also the reason why I have signed up for accounts on FanFiction as well as FictionPress. I like writing. Really. I love writing alot, in fact. I've always loved to just sit down and write down whatever stories or narratives that came to my head. In fact, at some point of my life, I will become a freelance writer. It's something that I think I will really enjoy doing. Yes. Writing is my life. I like writing under peaceful conditions, not under stressed conditions (read: exams). Ahh writing...

It's a pity I have to study for all my exams now. But I know I would definitely spend some quality time after the 'A' Levels to write. I know I will. :)

this is why you should never listen in on conversations on the bus

2009-08-17T14:14:00.002+08:00

OMG I swear I was merely spacing out like I normally do on the bus on friday, and these 3 girls decided to sit in front of me. Bad decision, 'cos whatever they talked about from that point of time totally made me laugh my ass off. Of course, I could burst out laughing all of a sudden, as I 'accidentally' listened in on their conversation while spacing out. I was almost dying trying to control my laughter inside. I was FOAMING I tell you. Gosh. It's a bit R-rated though.

Girl #1: "Why Jacqueline's eyes so small sia?"
Girl #2: "Aiyah, dunno lei. Her eyes never open wan can. I opened my eyes when I was 6 months old already. She's 13 years and still hasn't opened her eyes."
Girl #3: "Ehh, her boobs damn big also can."
Girl #2: "Aiyah, whatever lah. I don't like big."
Girl #3: "But big is good what."
Girl #2: "Nah, I don't like."
Girl #1: "Ehh, then how she do NAPFA ahh? What if her boobs were the circumference of the field? Then she'll be dragging all the way."
Girl #2: "Waseh, she not tired meh?"
Girl #3: "Ya, then when she enter the door, she will get stuck also."
Girl #1: "Ehh, like that then how she sleep?"
Girl #2: "Easy. Every night before she sleeps, she just cuts her boobs. So she can fit on the bed."
Girl #1: "Wahh, like that then how?"
Girl #2: "Ya lor, then everyday she come to school don't have boobs wan. Just blood."

Is this the kind of conversation people have nowadays? GOSH. I seriously foamed and laughed at all the ridiculous stuff they said. And did they happen to realize that they were on the bus? I happened to look around, and sadly enough, everyone else was sleeping. And pardon the bad usage of the English language. I would prefer to put into my archive the true extent of that senseless but hilarious conversation.

Why is everything acting so funny these days? Lol.

what is wrong with this world

2009-08-14T16:36:00.005+08:00

I'm going to die of exhaustion. Try sleeping 3 hours and you'll see what I mean. Agh. I have no idea why, but I've had so much difficulty sleeping yesterday. I practically couldn't open my eyes this morning.

Anyway, in case you don't know, I hate that condescending look you gave to me just because I couldn't answer a question. That face of disgust you gave totally disgusted me. FUCK YOU.

And, people should learn some basic courtesy. You do not enter a room where someone has occupied and plant your filthy ass there as though you own the whole place without even asking if that person is still using the place. And shut your damn pie holes. You distract people who are doing serious work. Idiots. Learn some basic manners.

And hello, please refrain from complaining to me about how you missed the A grade for a subject I've never ever passed in my entire life (read: Economics). Screw you. Whatever happened to being more sensitive to your friends?!

Why is this world so screwed up? And gosh, it's the end of week 7. Dammit. So much more to study still... *sigh*

words!

2009-08-13T16:48:00.006+08:00

Haha ok thanks Zhi Wei for the 5 words! This feels almost like a narrative, something I haven't done for a long time. I really miss it though.

1. Hip-hop

Wootz. I won't say it's my ultimate favourite genre of music, but definitely one of my favourites. I just love all the rapping and coolio beats, something people like Pei Khee would label 'noisy'. But not to me. And definitely my favourite genre for dance! Haha. :D

I never actually thought I'll make it into Street Dance, but ever since I went for auditions and I got through (OMG I don't know how I even got through since I totally sucked at catching dance steps then and I was struggling so much I had to get personalized attention), I've been hooked up to Street Dance. Hip-hop is not just a culture; it's an identity. It grows onto you, just like how it grew onto me and became an indispensable part of my life. It's not some stereotyped 'coolio' culture that only people who act cool want to adopt; it's for people who ARE cool. LOL.

And yes, I remember what Sherrie was saying about hip-hop videos. "The videos are all the same. Just watch one video and you'll know. It's always about the girls and the cars. See, these are the girls. And then the car comes out too." LOLOL. XD

2. Camwhore

Why did I guess that this word would come out?

Agh. Yes, it is something I would identify with myself. I think I've officially become the guy camwhore of the entire school, and maybe the Singapore community. LOL. Yes, this is considering the fact that I have the most number of tagged photos on Facebook standing at 2739 photos (OMG really?) currently, but me being me, that is subjected to futher increases some time soon. Haha.

I love pictures, on a more 'serious' note. I mean, what's not to love about photos? I think of photos as records of my beautiful memories with all my friends, which are memoirs that I'll look back at 10 years from now and be able to smile at these photos. :)

3. Resorts

Integrated Resorts is coming to Singapore! Haha I'm going to work there in a few years man! I'll be going for my degree in tourism / hospitality! WOOHOO! :D

OMG I so want to go overseas now and retreat in a resort, letting my hair down (figuratively, since I don't exactly have long hair lol) and relaxing. I love resorts. They look so romantic *hinthint* and it's like my dream getaway. After watching all the hype about resorts on Discovery Travel & Living channel, I've become even more obsessed with resorts. I WANNA OWN A RESORT! So that I can have a yacht and all and visit my resort like it's my summer home or something.

Tourism totally rocks my socks so naturally resorts come as a complement. Haha. I miss going overseas. So much to see and all. Oh man. Now I really wanna travel. Like, NOW.

4. Twilight

Lol. The sunset scenery or that series by Stephenie Meyers? XD

I can't believe I actually like the 'Twilight' movie and am looking forward to 'New Moon". Haiz. I know Zhi Wei will shake her head disapprovingly and foam at the mere mention of 'Twilight'. HAHA.

Gosh, I hate the stupid lines though, for one. What the hell is an 'incandescent chest'? Who in the world describes chest like this? Agh. This is sick. -.- And OMG I totally foamed at the scene when Edward walks into sunlight and Bella goes "You're beautiful". GOSH. Whatever happened to true romantic love lines?

Still, I will watch it, to enjoy the rom-com as well as to laugh at all the stupidest lines in the world.

Anyway, I love the scenery at twilight. So beautiful! :D

5. Orange

Lol this happens to be the name of our dance instructor who taught us her coolio item to perform at this year's Dance Night. So much better than *ahem* (name is censored).

Anyway, OMG MY FAVOURITE COLOUR! Haha I have an obsession with orange. I like the combination of orange and white in particular. My handphone is orange (and white). My pencil case is orange-based. I have 2 orange mechanical pencils, each of different shades LOL. I have an orange-inked pen (damn coolio can!). I have orange shoelaces. I have orange (and grey) shoes. I have orange shirts. My e-mail layout colour is orange. I think I'm just as obsessed with orange the way Pei Khee is obsessed with pink. HAHA. XD

I've had so much fun doing this though. Thanks to the person who created this idea. And thanks Zhi Wei haha! This definitely cheered me up. :) I'm surprised the words 'horror movie' or 'Final Destination' or 'Harper's Island' didn't come up though. LOL.

laugh out loud

2009-08-13T16:29:00.008+08:00

My brain cells are dying from all the nonsensical and not-that-intellectual dialogues. Someone save me. LOL.

Ms Chuah: "So, Jun Ming, who are you going to copy the (Economics) notes from? Or rather, who are you going to photocopy from?"
Jun Ming: "I think either Daniel or Zhi He."
Ms Chuah: (in disbelief) "Haiz. I only have one word for you. The word begins with 'L'."
Katrina: (immediately) "Loser."
Ms Chuah: "No, not 'loser'."
Katrina: "But it begins with 'L'."
Joanne: "Lazy."
Ms Chuah: "No, not 'lazy'. It's a 5-letter word beginning with 'L'."
Joanne: "Lousy."
Ms Chuah: "No. It's a word that is both a noun and a verb."
Nabilah: "Lamer."
Ms Chuah: "No lah, 'lamer' is not a verb."
Fiona: "Laoya (which means lousy in dialect)."
-- class erupts into laughter --
Ms Chuah: "No lah, the word is 'leech'."
-- class sinks into anti-climax --

Yu Xin: (offers Pei Khee) "Do you want sandwich?"
Xin Ran: "No lah, she doesn't eat inferior food."
-- Pei Khee erupts into laughter thinking that Xin Ran said she herself doesn't eat inferior food --
-- Yu Xin is confused --
Yu Xin: "Pei Khee, why are you laughing? Xin Ran was referring to you."
-- Pei Khee has nothing to say and Yu Xin and Xin Ran end up being the ones laughing --

Mr Kamal: "Who did not do their DRQ for homework? Please raise your hand and smile at me."

Mr Kamal: "How can breastfeeding reduce total fertility rates?"
Felicia: (not answering the question at all) "Breastfeeding can burn calories! They help you to lose weight."
Mr Kamal: "Ok. So how can breastfeeding reduce total fertility rates, not weight?"

Mr Kamal: "So what happens when a woman breastfeeds?"
Felicia: "The man wants it too."
-- class erupts into laughter --

Mr Kamal: "Who do you turn to when the man won't put it (condom as a contraceptive method) on?"
Zhi He: "Ghostbusters!"
-- class erupts into laughter again --

Mr Kamal: "So condom is a method of contraception. So what other methods of contraception are there?"
Felicia: "The permanent one (she meant the permanent contraceptive methods like sterilization)."
Mr Kamal: "Wahh, permanent one (referring to the condom) ahh? Like the 24-carat one made of gold?"
-- class erupts into never-ending laughter --

makes me wonder

2009-08-13T16:18:00.003+08:00

I got this information booklet yesterday with relevant details about possible scholarship opportunities. Heh. Scholarships. Even though I'm aiming to get the STB scholarship, I doubt my result will qualify me. I've got so tired talking about my grades. I'll just sum it up in 2 words -- they suck.

We had a talk by the principal during the assembly block yesterday too. Even the principal is telling us that the doom (read: 'A' Levels) is impending and that we should have already started preparing hardcore. I'm so terribly stressed out by everyone telling me about the approaching 'A' Levels. Yes. I do know that it is coming. I get tired of reminding myself too. In addition, there was a prize presentation ceremony for those who did well academically over this past one-and-a-half-year. Yay. So we basically save for ourselves the people who were smart (read: potential scholarship receivers i.e. competition!). Yes. It does suck sitting in the audience at these kinda events. I think the last time I was actually INVOLVED in a prize presentation ceremony was in secondary 2. For Japanese, which I happen to be screwing up now. Big time. Great. I love my life. -.-

On another note, our principal was telling us about how the students in our school often have good grades but do not really know what they want, which is evident through all the politically-correct answers provided during their interviews. Right. I'm the exact opposite. I know what I want, but stupid as I can be. Grr.

maybe i have some math blood

2009-08-12T15:45:00.002+08:00

By the way, I forgot to say... I THINK I TOTALLY ROCKED OUT TODAY'S MATHS CLASS QUIZ (functions, equations and inequalities)! :D So much for all my studying. I hope it pays off. --fingers crossed--

Do not judge me by this quiz. I totally suck in many other sub-topics (read: AP & GP, integration, differential equations etc...).

I need to master Maths. That'll save my 'A' Levels certificate.

L.O.V.E. is just another word i'll never learn to pronounce

2009-08-12T14:47:00.002+08:00

I fucking hate this world. I HATE HAVING TO FIGHT FOR EVERY SINGLE THING THAT I WANT.

I've done so much to try to achieve the best of everything. I give and give and give, from the bottom of my heart. I hate not having anything in return, sometimes not even the simple gratitude. I hate always being the replacement and having to play second fiddle to the things that I want. I hat being constantly maligned and accused for things I either didn't intended or even did.

I hate having to have such a pessimistic outlook on life at times. Trust me, I really hate it. I hate having nothing much to write about but rant about how my life sucks. I'm tired. But there's nothing that gives me a reason not to. Nothing has ever made me feel more confident of myself. Everything I do only serves a purpose in destroying me altogether. Everything seems so hard for me to achieve. I have received critiques for everything I do. Everything I do is always wrong. Nothing I do ends up right. AND WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?! When I try to explain myself, no one listens. When I shut up, people think I'm some dumbass fool.

I've learnt to control my temper since secondary 3. I thought it would be better for me. Yes, it proved to be better for me. On the outside, that is. But deep down inside, my anger just keeps building up and I never really released it. In fact, I don't remember the last time I really blew my top and erupted into a huge fury. This is coming from a person who has flipped a whole classroom table before. Yes. I FLIPPED A DAMN CLASSROOM TABLE BEFORE BECAUSE MY FRIEND TOTALLY PISSED ME OFF.

I've been dormant for almost 4 years now. I don't know when the doomsday will come, but at the rate all these things are annoying me, I WILL ERUPT SOON.

Can some bloody hell of a person understand all this shit I have to go through? I am a human being too, in case no one ever realized this fact. I have my emotional needs too, and I gave up a hell lot of it already. I'm not about to give up any much more of it. Call me selfish all you want. I think I need to start thinking about myself too.

And yes, I'm sick of the whole world telling me sorry for something that won't make me feel better or is unlikely to change the whole situation anyway. Sorry has been overused and overrated. I don't even believe the meaning of sorry now. Goodbye whatever sympathy and empathy I've had to this fucked up world.

It's always about other people. I never really get what I want at all. Why don't people start thinking about what I want? I'm tired of having to follow and wait for my turn, which probably never comes anyway.

For all those indifferent and apathetic idiots out there, it's not cool to keep breaking your promises. I thought you were my closer friends. Maybe we were never meant to be. For those who can never understand the shit teens these days have to go through, I swear I will be the next generation of parents (dad for that matter -- I'm emphasizing this for a reason) that will TRULY take into account the welfare of my skills. And stop bloody showing off how smart you are. For those hypocrites, fuck you. I have nothing else to say to you.

AND FUCK. It's prom and I don't get to sit with my girlfriend?!

This world is sick. I don't even know what my purpose in this life is anymore.

j-horror

2009-08-12T13:43:00.005+08:00

Who's the real J-Horror now? I hate having to face the J-Horror (almost every week now) and having to sit right beside this terror of my life in fear. In fear because I didn't comprehend a single word that was uttered in Japanese. In fear because I didn't know what to reply (IN JAPANESE). In fear because I have a feeling this scene will repeat itself when I'm taking my 'A' Levels oral examinations.

I hate this feeling of being so helpless, useless and hopeless. I was practically stoning there half the time, because I simply have no idea what I'm supposed to give a reply about. This scene is just re-enacting in my head again and again, this time in the actual 'A' Levels examination centre. Fuck. It's gone. I don't think anything can ever save me from the demise of Japanese now. I felt like crying at that point of time. Just me and the J-Horror. All the attention was on me. The unwanted attention. And I can totally sense the exasperation from the J-Horror, together with that dirty look one gives someone who can no longer be helped.

If only I could turn back time, I would do so many things differently. I wouldn't have taken Japanese too. Obviously I underestimated the difficulty of it in JC level and overestimated my ability to handle it. To think that 2 years ago I actually thought that Japanese would probably be the subject that would save my grades. It's totally reversed. This is gonna be one of the things I'll regret in my whole life. One of my biggest regrets.

It's no use trying to salvage anything about it now. Serves me right for trying to master another language altogether. Fuck.

hyperbolic doubt

2009-08-11T17:35:00.000+08:00

Woohoo! Finally this seemingly 'huge' project has been completed. To think that just a few hours ago, I wasn't exactly looking forward to the presentation. This is considering the fact that I've only managed to properly read my script this morning and that I've been so tired from trying to finish up my Physical Geography DRQ and essay yesterday till around midnight.

Still, it didn't seem that hard, for the fact that I'm lucky to possess this innate ability to be able to read out my script and act like I had rehearsed really well for it even though I was merely reading the script (some parts for the first time). LOL.

And I was happy for the fact that I managed to weave in a clip from Final Destination to relate to the idea of hyperbolic doubt proposed by Descartes. Coolios. :D Damn I should have promoted my favourite movie series abit more though. HAHA. And anyway, Katrina and Joanne saw right through me the minute I screened the video. They knew it was Final Destination, being me anyway. LOL.

Oh well, back to more work. So much more to do and revise. I'm mugging with Kenneth tomorrow yay! :D

our red parade

2009-08-11T14:12:00.016+08:00

So we have been excluded from the National Day celebrations by the school "a measure to control and confine the outbreak of swine flu". -.- But anyway, we didn't miss much I'm sure. In fact, I stayed back last thursday to mug in school with Zhi Wei, and we were joined by Eng Wei shortly after that.

Anyway, Zhi Wei, Pei Khee and I went out last friday to do up our GP presentation about this philosopher called Descartes and his school and thought what not. Gosh. A total dejavu of what we had to go through for 4 years under the philosophy syllabus our school has decided to integrate into our academic curriculum. And they even imposed this 'rule' that we would not be promoted provided we pass the subject. Great. Now it's back to haunt me... It's not that I don't enjoy philosophy. Just not in the midst of all this stress and gaga over mugging and the 'A' Levels. I'll probably read up abit on philosophy during my free time, given that it can be pretty interesting. Not now though.

Under the idea proposed by Pei Khee, the three of us decided to coordinate outfits and endorsed our red shirts and black jeans when we met up with one another. By the way, the red shirt was suggested by Zhi Wei, since she felt kinda patriotic at that time. Anyway, I think it's quite a cool concept (Pei Khee read this!), having not done it for such a long time. I think it makes the three of us look kind cute walking beside one another. LOL. :D

As recommended by Pei Khee (once again), we decided to camp in at the MOF restaurant at Raffles City, which apparently had no GST surcharge and free Wi-Fi. This obviously meant convenience, since we had to do our work and get something to fill our stomachs as well. So bascially my breakfast and lunch were settled there. I can't believe I went out of my house without having breakfast. Yes, that is another story too. I woke up at 7.30am that morning, but decided that it was too early for my liking and went back to laze on the bed. Bad decision, since that resulted in me sleeping all the way until 9.30am before taking just 8 minutes (record time to get ready I think) to dash out of the house in order not to be late. And OMG WE SPENT OVER $60 IN TOTAL THERE! No wonder our wallets were so empty then.

Anyway, being the people that we are (Zhi Wei would disagree), we camwhored abit, together with all the food that we ordered. OMG I LOVE THE FOOD!! :D Definitely one of the most delicious and authentic Japanese cuisines I ever tasted!

We later shifted our 'workplace' to the Esplanade Library, where we camwhored using the camera on Pei Khee's laptop with all the funny frames and special effects. LOL. And yes, there was a huge hassle over getting the wireless Internet connection in the library, which we later realized the reason why we could not get it was because Pei Khee entered the wrong username and password. Oh well, we still got our Internet connection in the end anyway.

On a side note, Pei Khee, please check your belongings before you go next time man... That Marc Jacob specs wouldn't be cheap to replace I reckon.

Whoever said we couldn't have our own red parade? Haha.

This was how much we spent (OMG!):

The three of us:

My food:

red little things

2009-08-06T15:02:00.003+08:00

I forgot my red shirt today. The red shirt that the school has printed for us for free (WOW unbelievable) to wear today supposedly for National Day. Heh. All the boys look like national flags and the girls look like Christmas trees. So essentially we have like a thousand over national flags and Christmas trees walking around school today. o.O

I had a good mind to actually go back home to get my red shirt. I only realized it when I reached school. But thank god for me being rational and sensible enough not to spend that extra money just to wear a red shirt. I saw that many people (mostly J2s) have boycotted the red shirt and just turned up in their school uniform. Maybe this is like a revolution to protest against the fact that we J2s are not invited to the school's National Day celebrations.

Agh. I have so much more work to do. I'll probably update more another time. Can't wait for tomorrow! Meeting with Zhi Wei and Pei Khee to do up the GP presentation and possibly hang out and probably watch the movie Up too! :D

more trailers that look so cool!

2009-08-06T14:21:00.005+08:00

OMG pretty cool. Yes, even though I know some people may actually kill me for saying this, but I actually wanna watch it. :D

OMG this looks so awesome. Looks like a masterpiece. I can't wait to watch it, and I hope I'll able to get out of the army already by then. --fingers crossed--

Stunning. I've always wanted to read the book, and now that the movie is going to be out, I hope it won't disappoint me. Looks so intriguing! :D

OMG. My mouth is still ajar in awe. This looks so cool. Now I have alot of movies I really wanna watch. Murder on the icefloor. Hmm...

2009-08-06T10:31:00.000+08:00

Damn. Seems like I can't resist myself from getting a Twitter account in the end. Follow me at orangedreamz. Sigh.

I still need a seat at the class table. :( :(

bad day

2009-08-05T17:24:00.002+08:00

Today is such a bad day for everything. There's no incentive to come to school at all, even though I know my parents would most probably kill me if I told them I wanted to skip school for a day.

Firstly, we had to do an essay for Human Geography. Right after that, I spent 1 hour waiting for my Japanese teacher to finish his consultation sessions with 2 other students before he attended to me to discuss about my Japanese coursework, which took another 1 hour. This essentially means that my whole 2-hour block of break was sacrificed. I'm glad that I was sensible enought to go down to grab a bite before going up for the consultation session. Then, we had a batch mock prelims Economics case study test after school, of which I wasn't exactly really prepared for, given the HUGE amount of workload that I had to complete over the past weeks. Especially Japanese. It's not like I had the luxury of time to really sit down and read mynotes or something, so I basically rushed through my revision yesterday night and this morning, which amounted to only about 5 hours. That's considering the fact that the whole syllabus from J1 AND J2 was tested. >.<

I guessed the only thing I was happy about was that I got 16 out of 20 for a probability-cum-hypothesis testing quiz I did about 2 weeks ago. The Economics case study paper today was actually pretty manageable, but that's if I had managed my time more wisely and had mugged up on more content which I could definitely put into my answers. At least this gives me some hope to Economics after all since this paper we did was the paper the previous batch did for 'A' Levels. Yes, for once in a blue moon, I see hope in my Economics. But this essentially means I have alot more to go to prepare for Economics.

I think I'm more productive when I have alot of work on my hands. I type faster, think faster and basically rush more. So I get more done too. Oh well. It's a trade-off.

AND SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO ABOUT PROM NIGHT? The initial problem was deciding whether to go or not, since paying $88 for an upgraded dinner and an elegant sit-down interaction and photo-taking session isn't exactly something that excites me. Instead it is more like a huge deterrent for me. Now, it isn't exactly about that. I'll most probably persuade my parents to let me go by promising to save up and pay for the dinner myself. But now, I have no idea which table I am going to sit at -- Street or class. Well, to be honest, I would rather sit with my class since I interact with them on a daily basis and besides, SOMEONE ELSE SITTING THERE IS A HUGE HUGE INCENTIVE. Thing is, there are already sufficient people (pending and confirmed) to make up a table of 12. I feel bad if I have to 'ditch' the Street table too since they are also lacking people to form a table. But there is an alternative for them too, which is to merge tables with another class, of which they have already found.

So I don't know... Even if I decide to go for prom and am allowed to, I don't know if I'll be able to find a table. AND I NEED TO MAKE A DECISION BY TODAY OR TOMORROW. Agh. Why do I always have to make decisions? Today isn't exactly a good day to make decisions too.

Tell me what to do.

better in time

2009-08-03T17:27:00.004+08:00

You know how people say about how things will always get better in time? I think that only applies to any form of medical illnesses, because that's the only thing I got better from for this whole period. My confidence level is not really back, my fitness level seems to remain as stagnant as ever no matter how many extra sets of training I do (maybe it's the intensity -- I should increase it), everything is still going as wrong as they can possibly go and I'm running out of time. Time deficit, I would call it.

Thank god for the countless blobs of phlegm I've managed to force myself to cough out. It feels much better, but it's pretty disgusting having to see all the blobs of phlegm coming out of my mouth and thinking about the fact that they've been inside for such a LONG TIME. Agh. Okay, I shall stop about the phlegm now because I'm freaking out.

But shit. I think I passed my flu to my mum. She has been so tired and sneexing her way through the weekend. Damn. I had no intention of passing it to her at all, and I was so afraid that this would happen since she has been keeping close contact with me over the past few days. Taking care of me. Wow. I can't be more grateful than that. Now that she's sick, I will have to take care of her too. I WANT TO.

So much more to study too. I haven't seen the school in its evening glory of lights for a long time, ever since I stopped going for Street I think. I miss it, but I think I'm better off without it for now. It took some time for me to get used to not going for Street, but now I have much more time in my hands. And to blog too haha. But anyway, the point is I have to study. There's so much more of content I have to cover within this short period of time, which is ticking by me as fast as it can go. Agh. >.< I have so much of memorization, understanding and application to go.

I decided to do a countdown yesterday to the number of days I have left before the 'A' Levels. Freaky. The countdown is now into double digits. 97 or 98 more days, if I'm not wrong. Gosh. I really don't know if I can make it in the end. Yet. I don't know. But anyway, I'm still going to work towards good (or better, for that matter) grades. I'm not raising a white flag anytime soon. Not ever I think.

And by the way, assembly resumed this morning. I haven't sung the national anthem or taken the pledge in god-knows-how-long. Not that I want to do it anyway. It has become such a routine that whatever national message they try to drill into us just fades into nothing. Okay, stop. I'm exercising my discipline and self-control here. I need to get back.

97 (or 98) days. I CAN DO IT!

chasing after time

2009-07-31T17:41:00.002+08:00

Gosh. I have so many things to do. I can't even spare the time to list all my homework down. seems like it's gonna be a really busy weekend for me. Plus I need to do my revision and prepare for the Economics case study test next week. Agh.

Anyway, coming to class is like reliving Harper's Island. It's like waiting to see who is the next hapless victim to get axed (i.e. to catch the fever / flu / cough bug and not come to school). LOL.

Miss Chuah: "The world is like this. We always have to guess what people want. We guess what the examiners want, what the teachers want, what parents want etc."
Sham: "Why don't people guess what I want?!"

Qing Yu: "Hey Li Wei!"
Sham: "WHAT?!"
Qing Yu: "Haha, nothing. I just like your Chinese name."
Sham: "Ok, whatever."
Qing Yu: (jokingly) "Shut up la, Li Wei."
Sham: (sarcastically) "Wow. I'm so scared. You said my name."

Me: "Lol. I can see both your cousins within 100m of you."
Zhi Wei: "Yaaaa... Agh. Why are they so smart? So annoying..."
Pei Khee and me: (in unison) "Why are YOU so smart?!"
Zhi Wei: (silence)

LOL. Ok, back to work.

a hygiene message

2009-07-30T14:07:00.001+08:00

Haha I know this is abit late, but I really loved this video. Hahaha. XD I think it would be cuter if the Wonder Girls actually sang it LOL.

coughing chorale

2009-07-30T13:36:00.001+08:00

I swear most of the school population has already caught the bug for fever / flu / cough. It almost seems like this is some whole new trend everyone is trying to follow, just like the Dickey school bags. Almost everywhere I go there's someone coughing away in pain or misery or whatever you call it.

Our class is exceptional. We can form a coughing chorale and create a coughing symphony of our own. We were all taking turns to dish out our share of coughs in alternating pattern during lessons today. I bet our GP tutor was so freaked out by it. There wasn't a full minute without a cough. Yes, that's how bad it is in our class. STAY AWAY FROM 09A03B! LOL.

Anyway, there was this random survey-of-the-year thing again that we had to do in the morning. Agh. 4 surveys, out of which 1 was super long and apparently only the former students from the male and female secondary divisions of our institution had to do. 100 pages OMG. And there was an internal server error at the end of it. Luckily it was only temporary, if not I WILL KILL SOMETHING IF I HAD TO RE-DO THE 100 PAGES LONG SURVEY.

Joanne: (to Pei Khee) "Thank god you lost your voice. It's so much quieter now."
Pei Khee: --cannot whine simply because she lost her voice--
Me: "Haha. Yes, Pei Khee lost like one octave of her voice already."
Felicia: "So we shall now all speak like this, so that we'll all sound like Pei Khee. (switches to low-pitch) Hi Pei Khee."

Felicia: (during Physical Geography class) "So what happens in the underwater world?"
Miss Wong: "Huh?"
Felicia: "In the ocean. Won't the fish get displaced by the rising and falling of sea levels and the strong counter-current?"
Sham: (whispers to me) "Ohh... I thought she meant the one in Sentosa."

HAHAHA. I will look back at all these conversations 10 years from now and have a good laugh. I need more of these.

knocks you down

2009-07-29T15:01:00.002+08:00

I'm much better already, except for the irritating feeling in my nose still. I still have a little bit of a flu, which I'm hoping will go away soon. Gosh, the bug is really spreading to everyone... Nowadays, there's sniffing in every corner of the class.

Anyway, I really am grateful to my mum, who is ever so attentive to me whenever I'm sick, especially over the past few weeks with the dengue fever and all. I really don't know how I'll be able to manage without her. I should learn to restrict my temper at times too. Oh well...

Everyone's in some sort of trance now mugging their asses off. It's pretty scary, until I realize I'm actually doing the same thing as well. It's do or die man. THIS IS IT.

you got my temperature rising like el nino

2009-07-28T16:30:00.003+08:00

Our class is falling sick one person at a time. Just yesterday, 5 people (including me) were absent from school due to fever / flu / cough. On sunday night, I knew something was wrong when I was feeling exceptionally tired and a bit heated up inside. True enough, I woke up yesterday to a fever of 37.9. Agh. My second fever after my epic dengue fever incident. Damn. I have a strange affinity with fevers.

Anyway, many others in our class have caught it too. Me, Katrina, Pei Khee, Jing Han and Xin Ran, and now possibly Jun Ming. Joanne and Qing Yu have already recovered from theirs, while the rest of us, or at least me, are still dying. Gosh. I really hate the muscle aches and all that come with fever. And yes, the medicine too. The drowsiness from some of the medicine is really getting to me and hitting me real hard. I felt so sleepy in my classes today. My eyelids were just so heavy I could fall asleep probably while walking.

There's something wrong with this school. Everyone seems to falling sick and it's not just a few people who are down with illnesses. It's like the entire school or something. Crazy stuff.

Anyway, I can't blog any further. My eyes are shutting on me and my nose is gonna fall off anytime soon with all the itch and fluid. I don't know what I'll do without my windbreaker now.

I hope I'll recover soon, as well as the rest of the class. Being sick sucks.

trailers for upcoming movies i wanna watch!

2009-07-24T16:18:00.004+08:00

Oh gosh... Freaky little girl goes on a massacre. I think I might watch this haha. If time permits though...

At least this Singaporean film looks promising, with dark humour. I might actually consider watching this. Again, if I have the time...

Many big names in here... Looks kinda dark and creep though... And OMG the lighthouse on Shutter Island looks like the one on Harper's Island. LOL.

This looks like a new slasher flick in Mandarin. LOL. Looks promising, so I hope it won't disappoint me. Haha.

every end is a new beginning

2009-07-24T15:34:00.003+08:00

Qingyu: --enters the classroom late for civics-- "Ehh so he (our civics tutor) isn't here ahh?"
(silence)
Qingyu: --lets out a shriek upon realizing that our civics tutor is standing at the back of the classroom and has heard all that she said--

Haha, and that was the anecdote of the day.

Lol, for some reason, I've suddenly become Pei Khee's Japanese teacher since a few days ago. That means I'll be teaching her at least 1 Japanese word everyday. Haha. Not bad la, at least she has the potential for learning languages. Haha. My new obsessions is with Korean. Sounds so cool! Haha. And besides I can pick up some words from all the Korean dramas I've been watching...

And oh gosh, the topic for this term's GP is philosophy and history... *sigh* It's a hard topic, especially since I didn't do really well for philosophy when we were forced to take it as an examination subject for four years in secondary school. All the questions like "How do you know you know when you say you know?" or "How do you justify that the sun will always rise tomorrow?"All the intellectual content that a non-intellectual being like me struggled so much to grasp. Haiz.

And lol, somehow GP lesson turned into a discussion between me, Zhi Wei and Pei Khee about, umm, make-up. HAHA. In fact, it is ironic that Pei Khee was asking me questions like how to put on eyeliner and eye shadow etc when I'm the guy here. Thanks to Street Dance though for the fact that I've had so much experience with make-up. Heh.

End of week 4. Just a few more weeks to Prelims. So much to do and so little time. *sigh*

harder, better, faster, stronger

2009-07-23T16:59:00.002+08:00

My body is aching from the 650 dumbbell raises yesterday. Agh. >.< I woke up today and was hit by this immense ache all over. Scary... But this is for betterment, so I shan't complain.

And yes, I'm going to lay out my study plan from now till Prelims, which includes doing essays upon essays and major revising and summarizing and memorizing. Hard work, but I will do it.

Oh gosh, I can't believe Zhi Wei and Sham were trapped in the lift today. LOL. Upon hearing that, Pei Khee let out a huge shriek (as usual LOL) and the whole class was camping outside the lift, despite the relief Maths teacher being in class already. It was kinda funny though, knowing that Sham would most probably rant on about how she was trapped in the lift and all. HAHA. Still, they managed to get out within 20 minutes, but not after being the 'highlight' for those on the ground floor who could see what was going on in the lift under the surveillance cameras.

Me: "So how was the experience like being trapped in the lift?"
Sham: "Agh. It was horrible. I was so hungry I could just starve to death inside."
Me: --laughs-- "Yes, I can totally picture you in the lift making a huge fuss about it."
Sham: "I would have climbed out of the lift by opening that ventilator atop the life and climb down the elevator shaft. Like some action film."
Me: --laughs even more--

Oh yes, my first topic for Japanese coursework got rejected. Damn.

everyone needs a little help now and then

2009-07-22T16:49:00.010+08:00

I've put back seeking help from my civics tutor on many occasions. One, I was a little afraid. Two, I didn't want to trouble my civics tutor, who probably already has a thousand other things on her busy schedule. Three, I thought I could resolve it myself, given time. BIG MISTAKE. I can't believe how foolish I've actually been.

It does help to speak out about my problems to someone. Someone other than friends. It feels different for one, and I know that I'm most probably getting a more objective response. I'm really grateful to my civics tutor for taking time off her busy schedule to just sit down, listen to my problems and give me some advice. Thank you so much... You really do make my day brighten up amidst the ever-present dark clouds. :)

I think I really lack confidence. I've never really been confident of my abilities, as the results do not show most of the time. It's a vicious cycle, and my confidence level goes down each time. And yes, I'm very much a worrier. I worry too much about things at times, so much that it affects almost everything I do.

But what my civics tutor said was true. I should not let anything affect my confidence. When I'm sitting for exams, it is not wise to set an expectation and keep harping on that expectation throughout the paper. It does reflect on the quality of work produced someway or another. Instead, the way to approach an exam would be to look at the question, understand all the requirements of the question and proceed to tackle the questions one at a time. Once the time limit is up for one question, move on. In addition, the trick would be to answer the questions like they were just questions normally asked in class.

And apparently, it would take a really screwed up person to screw up the 'A' Levels, according to what my civics tutor observed over the past years. I'm really glad that my civics tutor does have confidence in me doing reasonably well for Prelims and 'A' Levels.

Yes, I guess the only way now is through sheer hard work and loads of practices. I can't let everyone who has confidence in me down. Most importantly, I can't let myself down. Think positive.

I'm sharing this because I want readers of my blog to take this away with them too.

I WILL WORK HARD. JIAYOU ISAAC!

the moment of truth

2009-07-22T16:49:00.008+08:00

I've procrastinated it for at least a week. I saw this doomsday coming. It was only a matter of time, and I've tried my best to push it back as far as possible. But in order not to arouse any suspicions, I finally showed my parents my grades for this CTs on tuesday.

No prizes for guessing how they reacted upon seeing the marks. Or rather, the lack of it. My mum was pissed of course. I was expecting my dad to erupt into a fury, but he didn't really get pissed. Instead, he sorta gave up on me. And I agree. There isn't really anything I've achieved from my 6 years in this institution. I've failed countless times. My grades have slipped beyond decency. In fact, I don't even believe these are the grades I'm getting. Then again, maybe it's easier to believe so.

Entering a university seems more ambitious as the days go by. Students with straight As already have difficulty getting into universities, let alone someone like me with atrocious grades. As much as they may say grades don't always matter, grades actually do matter. In fact, it is often the first criteria to getting many other things. There's no denying it. It's hard not to look at grades. Just like how it's hard not to judge many things based on first impressions or physical appeal. Ideals never get materialized. Never. That's the harsh fact of life.

I need to make that miracle happen, but I really don't know how. I do know for one that I will stop all Facebook games and quizzes that always distract me from my studies, and cut down on music intake as that distracts me too. Yes. NO MORE FACEBOOK GAMES AND QUIZZES, ISAAC. These are just silly distractions. You can do without them.

I have no idea how much all these 'measures' will help. I knew it was hard to get good grades; I never knew it would be this hard.

this girl is stuck on my elevator

2009-07-22T16:49:00.007+08:00

--lift doors open--
--everyone steps in--
--Winnie, Suzanne and Audrey try to fit in--
--lift doors remain open--
--Winnie, Suzanne and Audrey decide to step out--
--lift doors still won't close--
Vincent: (to the girl controlling the lift buttons) "Wrong button!"
--everyone foams and dies laughing--

Oh gosh. That girl was pressing the 'Doors Open' button the whole time and didn't even realize it! LOL. That is something memorable indeed. I would be so embarrassed if I were her.

Anyway, for once the entire year (if I remember correctly), our Economics tutor wasn't here, so we got the first period off on monday. I was kinda relieved, not for the fact that there was no Economics tutorial, but I had to save my stomach.

Oh yes, I do have a funny bone for funny accents and mispronounced words. LOL.

the magical touch

2009-07-22T16:14:00.029+08:00

It isn't as bad as some people depict it to be, but it isn't good like how many die-hard fans paint it to be. It was pretty mediocre in fact, and I know saying this would make several die-hard fans around the world kill me or something. But really, comparatively, this movie does not stand out.

Yes, I watched the sixth instalment -- Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince -- on sunday with my mum. By the way, did I say that my mum was really excited to watch it when she saw the trailer on TV one day? Haha... Yes. In fact, I've heard many stories about their mums initiating a movie outing to watch Harry Potter as well. LOL. That made me one of the 'early birds' to catch it within the first week of release.

Okay, before I go into how the movie was, I need to say something....

OMG OMG OMG!!! They screened the trailer for The Final Destination (i.e. Final Destination 4) in the cinema! :D Okay, it's not like I haven't watched it some 50+ times already. but it's a total different experience watching it on the big screen! I was so excited that I sat up straight in my seat RIGHT AWAY! Haha. I was really hoping that they'll show it in the cinema but I sorta gave up hope since Harry Potter was a PG show after all and the entire cinema was filled with little kids. Their parents would most probably complain about how cinema operators should not be showing such trailers before a PG show. In addition, they've always been screening trailers of the same genre of the actual movie, so yea...

Of course, there was this parent behind me going 'tsk tsk' upon seeing the trailer. I know exactly what he's thinking. He probably thinks it's just another slasher flick in which hapless victims die off in different ways and probably doesn't understand why hot-blooded teens are so keen on watching it. Whatever. He doesn't understand the art of a good franchise. Tsk. Haha. I'm glad I watched it at least once in the cinema.

Enough obsession. Anyway, I loved the special effects in Harry Potter, especially in the opening scene where we are viewing the movie in the eyes of the Death Eaters while flying through the streets of London. And yes, the opening scene alone has set the mood for the rest of the movie. Each instalment gets increasingly darker, and the number of kissing scenes increases too. In fact, it seemed like a total teen drama in certain parts of the movie more than it was about the half-blood prince. For those who don't read the book (e.g. me), it gets kinda confusing since the theme surrounding the half-blood prince wasn't even addressed that evidently. Yes, drifting away from the main plot too much can be bad and this instalment falls into this trap.

By the way, Rupert Grint is totally hilarious. His face alone cracks everyone up, let alone his goofy antics and silly lines. And Tom Felton's acting has improved alot, which probably comes with the taking on of a more significant role as well. Of course, this give girls one more excuse to drool over Tom Felton. Not as if the girls in our class haven't already. -cue for Joanne, Jing Han and Pei Khee to scream-

Yes, I need to do my part too. Emma Watson is HOT HOT HOT! :D Hahahaha. She has blossomed into such a beauty and even secured herself a Burberry deal... Cool.

Did I tell you that City Hall seems to be the place for hanging out for our school people on sunday? I saw at least 10 different groups of people, but I reckon the especially high volume that day was due to the university convention at Suntec City. Still, it almost felt like being back in school with all the familiar faces. Save for the lack of uniforms.

Haiz. I wish magical powers like that of Harry Potter were real. That way I'll probably be able to deal with sticky situations better, Like bad grades... *sigh*

But it's not like I would have the magical touch anyway. I just broke a glass cup today. Damn my butter fingers. I can't believe the number of things that have been destroyed in my hands.

Still, I NEED to flick that magic wand.

Movie posters for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince:

Emma Watsons' Burberry ads (SO HOT!):

Tom Felton (for Pei Khee's, Jing Han's and Joanne's sake):

pocketful of sunshine

2009-07-20T16:39:00.022+08:00

Hmm... When I watch movies, I really do watch all of them at one go. And then arrives this period of stagnation when I'll be so busy settling and trying to tie up loose ends to my work, hence no movies... Then, it's back to the whole movie marathon again. LOL.

I went out with Zhi Wei on saturday, after such a long while. Thank god for the outing that pretty much turned out to be a good stress reliever. Anyway, we were out at Plaza Singapura, simply for the fact that the movie Sunshine Cleaning wasn't screened anywhere else in town except in Plaza Singapura. The queue didn't turn out to be as long as I had expected it to be, since it's the third day of the release of the sixth instalment of Harry Potter. Okay, partly because I was there early too.

Sunshine Cleaning was really good! Okay, so it wasn't the type that leaves your jaws wide open or the one to win big at movie awards, but it was still good. I have to admit though, that when I first watched the trailer, I thought that this movie might go along the brinks of becoming an artsy-artsy sorta film. But nope, it went a little more commercial and that did make it better and more entertaining. In other words, I love it. I love the way in which the story is thought out and then depicted in a movie.

It's basically a story about two sisters going into this business of cleaning up the remnants of crime scenes so as to earn a stable income to support their family. Of course, misadventures follow and the sisters' relationship strengthens in the end. But it's not just the typical movie you watch anywhere else. There's something in this movie that appeals to you. It brings out that 'sunshine' that is in its title. It is a sad tale, but told with wit and humour (sometimes dark). It breaks out of convention and is indeed strong on characterization, which makes relating to these characters easier. And there is a side plot in the movie too, where one sister tries to locate the daughter of someone who passed away.

Okay, I'm starting to sound like a movie critic, which I happen to want to be anyway since a few years back. Haha... :D Anyway, I didn't really get the NC16 rating though since there weren't exactly an influx of coarse language and drug references.

Talking about film ratings, yes, here's an account of how stupid I can get sometimes... And how irritating people at the counter can be too. Agh.

Me: "Hi can I have 2 tickets to Sunshine Cleaning at 11.50am?"

Cashier: "How old is your friend?"

Me: "16!" (I blurted out 16 for some reason even though I meant to say 18... -.- What was I thinking?)

Cashier: "You sure your friend is 16? Why don't you and your friend come back later (and wait forever to be served again) 'cos I need to check both your ICs?"

Me: "Why don't you just check it where we enter the cinema? And yes, my friend is 16." (DUH do you think I would re-queue again just to get the tickets?!)

Cashier: "You sure your friend is 16? 'Cos there are no refunds for tickets and you cannot exchange the tickets for another movie."

Me: "YES! I said that already."

Sucks. If I get checked for my age for NC16 films, haiz... You get what I mean.

Movie poster and screen shots from Sunshine Cleaning:

careless tendencies

2009-07-17T15:34:00.003+08:00

Zhi Wei: "Should I buy this bear (for birthday present)?"
Me: "Ok, it looks cute."
Zhi Wei: "Cute right!" --grabs the bear from the shelf and accidentally knocks another bear off-- "Ahh!" --screams and in the midst of trying to catch the falling bear, whacks the falling bear with her hand some 2.5m across the shop--
Me: --goes into a laughing fit--

Sham: "WHERE"S MY DISINFECTANT?!"
Me: "I don't know."
Sham: "Damn. Now I won't be germ-free."

Pei Khee: "I look so ugly in the class photo!" --whines--
Me: "No la, where got ugly sia?"
Pei Khee: "Aiyah, I order all 3 photos also. Help me tick lei. But then I look so ugly!"
Mr Kamal: "Yes. I look so ugly in all the photos this time round."
Pei Khee: "Ya lor, so ugly! (referring to herself)"
Mr Kamal: (jokingly) "Shut up! (thinking that her comment was referring to him)"
Pei Khee: --whines devastatedly--

LOL. It's funny how silly and hilarious some people can be. HAHAHA... :D I got into 3 laughing fits within a span of 2 days! Lol. Okay, maybe more than 3. Lol. Anyway, someone should keep a counter on her blog or something, so as to record the number of times she dropped something in a day, E.g. at the end of the blog entry, write something like "I dropped n number of things today!" HAHAHA. LMAO. Sorry. But it's so funny. And cute. Hurhur.

I think laughter is a really good medicine. I feel better. For now at least, before the doomsday when I show my dad my results. AGH. >.<

Sunshine Cleaning trailer

2009-07-16T15:17:00.002+08:00

This looks good! Haha I think I'm gonna watch it! :D

these tears i shed

2009-07-16T14:27:00.007+08:00

Damn it. I just passed my GP essay. And I only managed to dig out 1 more mark from my comprehension, which doesn't make a difference in my grade. I need 2 and a half marks to jump a grade. This sucks. I hate the grading system. Just a mark or two away and you're in a whole different grade range.

But anyway, I really appreciate my GP tutor trying to help me get a few more marks when he asked for my paper to see if he could add any more additional marks. That is ONE OF THE NICEST THINGS I'VE HAD IN MY LIFE! :) Thank you... :) -touched-

Oh yes, and by the way, I BROKE MY RECORD FOR THE VOCABULARY SECTION IN THE GP COMPREHENSION! 4 upon 5! OMG so cool right? Haha. And anyway, I can't believe I got 13 upon 15 for my language! ARE YOU SERIOUS? Lol. Such a huge contrast to my GP essay anyway. Sucks.

Anyway, why in the world are the GP, Economics and Human Geography Prelims on Week 10 THIS TERM?! Ag. They are out to kill us honestly... I don't want to die anymore. Really. I've died enough to make my life 'fulfilling'.

I came across something really true yesterday in the Korean drama I was watching. Everytime I lose, I start to see the people around me even more clearly. And only then will I realize I'm not the only one fighting the battle. And I cannot handle everything myself, no matter how much I try.

I almost cried at several of the scenes coming from different Korean dramas. *sigh* I'm really sensitive these few days, mainly because of my grades I think. I cried myself to sleep 2 days back. I've done this so often that it has become a routine. I wish I don't have to do this anymore. Sometimes I really feel like giving up, but I know I can't. Sometimes I really don't believe myself, no matter how good friends will comfort you by saying everyone is good in their own aspects. Yeah, that's what I always say to my friends too when they're upset. But I never really took the advice myself. Yes, I live these ironies all the time.

On a side note, I think you should really catch 2 of the Korean dramas that I'm currently watching on KBS World channel on cable TV. They're really great and hilarious at times.

"The Accidental Couple":

"Hello, God!":

freeze-thaw action

2009-07-15T14:36:00.002+08:00

Somehow rubbing my hands and jumping around in my chair doesn't help. It's FREEZING COLD in the computer lab. I have no idea why they like to set temperatures so low in a room that's sometimes barely occupied by anyone. Doesn't it cost alot for electricity bills? *brrr* I'm freezing my ass off, so I'll make this fast.

Anyway, I'm really scared. I don't know what my father will do to me this time round. It's like a routine I have to do every 3 months -- confess about my ever so sucky results. And then comes hell. Fuck. I hate this.

Okay, stop, my teeth is chattering non-stop right now, so you can imagine how cold I am right now, so I'll speed up my typing.

Oh yes, today saw a very interesting and hilarious conversation between Sham and Pei Khee. Hahaha. XD Apparently, for some reason, Sham was so interested about what Pei Khee does for all her music tests and was bugging her the whole morning finding out about symphonies, recitals, compositions what not. LOL. And of course, there was the part when Sham uttered something like "random spurts of pee", which almost made me fall off my chair in laughter. Don't ask. I shan't elaborate. Lol.

Okay, I seriously have to go. It's freaking cold in here and my ass would be stuck to the chair in ice soon. Besides, I need to vent. Somehow. And of course, think about what I should do to get myself mentally prepared for some drilling.

Shit. My life sucks.

already gone

2009-07-14T14:14:00.003+08:00

Really. I should just quit school. With the grades I'm continually getting, I won't even qualify for a university.

I have no idea what that whole thing about the 1 mark for question 1 in the Economics paper is about, but it makes a huge difference because I WILL JUMP A GRADE. I desperately need that 1 mark. Sucks. Economics has never given me a reason to like it. I haven't passed a single test in Economics before. I don't see how I can do that in the Prelims or 'A' Levels. Honestly. Despite all the talk about going on the miracle curve. Yeah, I'm on it, but downwards.

Trust me when I say bad things hit you all at one go. I got back my Maths CT paper too. I passed, but it was just a scrape pass. Not like my father would care that half the population in school probably died pretty badly also. I would just die in his hands. Fuck. Now I really don't want to show him my CT papers. Not like I ever did wanted. He always kills me for my grades, and I know it's weird for me to say this, but yes, I agree that he has sufficient reason to kill me.

I guess the best part about today was GP CT paper, which wasn't too badly done. At least for the comprehension because that is what we got back. It was a B, so I'm in no league to complain or anything. But anyway, it was funny to hear about this 'fight' between Sham and Daniel to get the top for GP in class. Of course, Sham the GP queen managed to retain her position, without much effort too.

I really don't know what to do now. The sight of my father would just make me even more emo than I've already been the whole of today. I wish I could do something to make my life better, or at least my grades. I really CANNOT keep failing Economics. But I don't know what to do to NOT fail.

I need to vent. Seriously. Stabbing the plastic plate with my chopsticks didn't really help. I need to vent out somewhere else. I'm so sick of failing everything. AND THE LAST THING I WANNA HEAR IS ABOUT HOW OTHERS ARE COMPLAINING ABOUT MISSING 'A' GRADES. Come on, here I am trying to get a pass and there you are whining about how you missed your perfect grade. SCREW YOU seriously. No, FUCK YOU. Be more socially aware, would you? Just because you got an 'A' doesn't mean that everyone else in the world got an 'A'.

I need to do something about my life.

life goes on... right?

2009-07-13T17:01:00.002+08:00

The Japanese main paper was crazy too. And I finished it just 5 minutes before the time is up, which doesn't normally happen. And the definition of 'finish' here means filling in the answers. It does not include the definition of it being completed sensibly or logically. Hell. I would have failed the paper I think. I don't even know if I'm writing Japanese for the answers.

I got back my Physical Geography paper today. It was okay, but I guess it really isn't that much an indication of how well I'll do in the Prelims anyway. Firstly, I accidentally found out the questions before I even took the test as everyone was just chattering away. So, naturally I would study more on those few topics. I guess it doesn't help if I say that I've kinda guessed these questions would have come up, but I did. Really. Our teacher gave a pretty obvious hint, and I don't understand why many didn't even catch it. Okay, all except the granite question. I know all of you would probably kill me or something, but I like granite. AND I CAN SCORE OKAY IN IT TOO. So that didn't really kill me. Just that I wasn't expecting it to come out again in a test since it had already did. Which means that the topic of extrusive volcanism hadn't been tested AT ALL. Good thing too, since I never really studied in depth for it.

Okay, so I got a B for it. But that doesn't say much. In a normal test, we would have choices on the essay questions we would want to do and definitely would be better in. There wasn't a choice this time round. And basicaly the scope was wider. Much wider. Coupled with the fact that the questions were VERY specific.

Whatever. That still doesn't ease me one bit. I'm getting back my Maths paper tomorrow morning during civics. Wow. What a way to ruin a tuesday morning. -.- I think I'm gonna fail it, and then I'll get hell from my parents. Okay, more like my dad. But the thought of it... Agh. Hate it. Why the hell do we have to learn so many damn things around curves and their areas and what not?! Honestly, I don't see myself telling my future employer that I have to find some volume of the solid revolved around the y-axis. I don't think he cares too. Sorry Maths geeks. I've never really liked Maths.

And yes, GP paper will be back tomorrow too. I can't say I'm confident, but I don't feel so bad. Yet. I hope I won't. The teachers are really scaring us. And it's a few months to 'A' Levels. I can't believe I'm even saying this. What am I thinking? NO I DON'T THINK. I should start using my brain soon. Or what's left of it. Damn. I really wonder how I'll feel like after the whole 'A' Levels.

That is, later. Right now, it's still studies. Agh. Sucks. >.<

the mystery is finally revealed

2009-07-13T16:12:00.004+08:00

Okay, after sitting down to think about it, Harper's Island isn't that bad. REALLY. I think the main reason why we all felt that the episode kinda sucked was because there was an attempt by the scriptwriters to make it sorta abstract, and it ended up falling into the whole genre of cliche dramas as well. But anyway, isn't this the kind of script that people like us just foolishly watch and enjoy everytime?

So it was revealed. The killer had been Henry all along. THE GROOM. Turns out he had been killing everyone to get to his loved one -- Abby. Nope, not Trish. Trish, the bride, turned out to be just a bait for Abby to return back to Harper's Island so that they can reunite. Yes cliche and all. I see all your eyes rolling already. The impossible relationships (Henry and Wakefield are part of a family), the childhood innocence that led into this character that Henry turned out to be as a result of what Abby said when they were young, the final killer being killed by his loved one and all. Yes. Cliche. But honestly, it was a good plot I think, just that it has been recycled countless times. Still, I don't think that Harper's Island had to be rendered 'trash' just because of that. IT WAS GOOD AND I STAND UP TO CLAP FOR IT. Just a few loopholes in the plot, but this drama had a lot of potential in it, just that it wasn't fulfilled the way most people might have expected it to.

Anyway, it's sad the way Henry turned out to be. Yes, we all condemn him because of the demise of the other characters who get killed even though they may be totally innocent, but it wasn't something that Henry could help given his past.

That said, I hope Harper's Island season 2 would be a better one (I heard it's coming out). At long last my curiosity is cured... *sigh*

THE KILLER:

discipline

2009-07-10T16:26:00.002+08:00

Crazy stuff. I finally did my Geography CT paper yesterday. Yes, that meant isolating myself at one corner of the room without the distraction of that huge media box known as the television. I was drenched in sweat at the end of the paper. In both physical and figurative terms. It's got to be one of the hardest geography papers ever. I couldn't have imagined actually doing it during the CTs itself, though I don't know if missing the Geography paper was a good thing.

I realized that I could spot questions pretty well after all, but somehow that never really translated into good results anyway. I spotted 3 and a half questions right for Economics CT -- inflation, interest rate, elasticities of demand and monopolistic competition. Still, that didn't prove to be much of a relief for me. In fact, I hadn't exactly studied alot of content IN DETAIL. I don't know if it's something wrong with my studying method, or simply for the fact that I get distracted pretty often AND easily. Still, Economics turned out to be the subject I had the 'most' confidence in, apart from GP.

MATHS WAS HORRIBLE. It wasn't as bad as the promos paper, but still as bad in my terms. I had trouble doing the FIRST PAGE, let alone the rest of the paper. I had a good mind to skip the entire paper altogether, but I couldn't bring myself to just give up on a paper. I reached the end of the paper around halfway through. Not good. That meant I had hell lotta questions I had no idea how to solve at all. And it really didn't help that my fever came back halfway through the paper. I seem to have an unfortunate affinity with sickness during the exam periods. I took my end-of-year exams in secondary 4 in flu and cough, the Japanese Language Proficiency Test Level 2 (of which I failed) in secondary 4 in high fever. I can't remember the others, but I'm sure I was sick in some way or another. And now this. I had to even miss the rest of CTs.

If there's one thing I regret in my JC life, it would be to take H2 Japanese. I totally killed myself when I selected that option during the subject matriculation. It's one of the stupidest things I've ever done, if not the stupidest. I CANNOT HANDLE JAPANESE AT ALL. Half the time during Japanese lessons, I've no idea what my teacher is uttering at all. I wonder if I'm even listening to him speak Japanese. Almost 6 years and there is still not much progress. I really don't see myself taking the 'A' Levels paper in just a few months, with my shallow understanding of such a language.

I think I really need some discipline. I've been allowing myself to get distracted by all the things in the world. Facebook applications, Korean dramas on TV, surfing the net etc. I think I have almost no self-control at times. I don't know. I need to make that change, but somehow it's taking much longer than expected. And it's hard. It's hard to make a change, as easy as it may always sound.

Someone help me a little. I'm about one of the worst students in my school I think. The school might just kick me out sometime. Damn.

boom de yada, boom de yada

2009-07-10T16:23:00.003+08:00

I got this from my cousin's blog page. Love it loads man. It's so cool. Haha. :D

that purple dinosaur and those birds and bees

2009-07-10T13:46:00.004+08:00

OMG. It was a totally hilarious conversation with my clique today, especially Sham. Haha... That whole 'ranting' about how Barney (Sham's favourite childhood character!) is no longer the Barney that used to catch so much of her attention. Haha. All that about how Barney and the little kids no longer sang together in harmony, about how Barney's voice became so awful so much that he is now a bad influence on the kids, about how Barney doesn't even sing properly these days... LOL.

I never really watched Barney as a kid, but I do have my share of other cartoons. Scooby Doo, Dexter's Laboratory, Pokemon, Powerpuff Girls etc...Yes. I've had my share of cartoons too. And it's kinda nostalgic. But it's weird to re-watch the episodes of the cartoons that I used to watch. They used to be so funny and engaging; now it's just on the verge of being really, really lame. Sorry. Comes with maturity I guess...

And yes, what about the birds and bees? Why is it even 'birds' and 'bees' to begin with in the first place? I have no idea on the origins of this term. Right, birds and bees pollinate the flower, so probably that's a representation of fertilization and what not about sex. Still, don't birds and bees represent the same thing anyway? Why not 'birds and flowers' or something to that effect? Heh. Terms are weird. Never to be figured out I think.

But anyway, it's kinda interesting to find out how people first found out on this 'taboo' topic, which is constantly infiltrating the minds of many youths anyway so any extent of taboo wouldn't have a real effect. But yeah, it does remind me about how I got through primary school not knowing what in the world a condom was and getting laughed at by all my primary school mates for being that 'innocent'. Of course, the moment of realization came when Durex sent this mailer to every home about how you can save your embarrassment at the counter by purchasing your 'required materials' via mail order. Yes, weird but that was THE moment.

Okay, I'm starting to sound like Animal Planet talking about all these animals. I have a Japanese lesson to attend in a few minutes. Agh. >.<

blood bath

2009-07-09T15:55:00.019+08:00

24 down. 8 more main characters. 2 more episodes. Come on... I'm dying to find out who the killer for Harper's Island is. >.<

BODY COUNT FOR THE 17 MAIN CHARACTERS:

thank god it's finally over

2009-07-09T14:33:00.002+08:00

$170.40 in total. 5 blood tests for 5 consecutive days. Running from my neighbourhood clinic to Changi General Hospital to the polyclinic. DAMN I HATE DENGUE. >.<

I had dengue fever since last Wednesday, which explains the fluctuating temperatures I've been having for about 3 days last week. My temperature rose from 36.7 to 38.8 and even 39.0 in a day, then all of a sudden decreased again. And it was so painful. I was aching all over, and feeling so weak for one of not-so-many times in my life. And it was so difficult to get to sleep, for the fact that I was feeling hot and cold at random intervals.

Then, everything got better on saturday, but all of a sudden, rashes started to appear on my hands and legs. AND IT ITCHED! I itched the whole of saturday night. 5 WHOLE HOURS OF FLIPPING ON THE BED IN DISCOMFORT AND LOT OF ITCH, ITCH AND MORE ITCH. It was undoubtedly one of the worst experiences I had.

And yes, then NEA started bugging me with all the details they had to find out so as to prevent the next hapless victim in our neighbourhood from getting the dengue fever. Agh. Why didn't they do it earlier?! I missed my geography CTs (it was a KILLER I heard) and japanese CTs, of which I'm not that grateful for. And besides, it wasn't really a rest. I was feeling pretty uncomfortable most of the time. I'll rather be in school.

I was waiting so long to finally go back to school, and I'm so relieved to be back. No longer classified a patient. No longer having to go to the polyclinic for a blood test to check on my blood platelet and my white blood cell count. No longer listed as patient number 1234 or whatsoever. No longer having to hear that chime of the bell signalling it's time to enter the doctor's room. I'M SO GLAD.

The next thing I wanna do is EXTERMINATE ALL THE MOSQUITOES IN THE WORLD. Screw them. They totally disrupted my schedule and caused me to fall behind on so many things. And yes, I lost my official last Youth Day. GARHH.

I'm just relieved it's over.

change

2009-06-24T08:46:00.005+08:00

The world is changing.

The weather is erratic and extreme too. My family never used to drink carbonated beverages; now we embrace at least one 1.5-litre bottle per day. All the air-conditioners in my house gave up on my family several years back and no one bothered to get ANY of them fixed (I wonder why); now I feel like some pampered kid who needs to be under the huge machine spewing out cool air. I used to be clueless as to what a condom is; now I know alot of 'stuff' both in and out (okay, no innuendos here). I used to be damn intimidated by horror movies; ask anyone now and they'll tell you I'm about the biggest fan of horror movies. Case in point, Final Destination and Harper's Island.

Wow. Kinda unbelievable how much things have changed. It doesn't even feel like 17 years, to be honest. It feels rather weird to look back and see how far you've come, or not. I'm about to take my 'A' Levels and soon, I'll be in the army. Then after 2 years of service, I'll be in university. Hmm. I don't even know if I'm qualified to make that statement. University education really sounds like a privilege to me, with all that entry requirements what not. With the kinda grades I'm getting right now, I'm better off not studying. I've always known that I'm not exactly studying material, yet I've lived in this huge lie for years. But now that I'm in it, there's no way out, especially with the 'A' Levels coming in, what, 5 months? >.<>' that I'll make it? I hope so. No, not 'hope'. I HAVE to do it, don't I? The very minute I was born into this world, I have been living on expectations. Expectations that everyone else who has appeared in this world before me has set. I don't know if that's what life is about, but it seems like it has been the way I've lived my 17 years. Maybe it's better for me this way.

It's not what you skeptics would most probably label as pessimism. I'm being realistic here.

I really hope I can achieve it all in the end. I really hope...

oops! i did it again

2009-06-24T08:36:00.002+08:00

Never mind. I told myself I won't be blogging until the CTs are over, yet I'm sitting here typing this entry. Damn.

I don't know. In a weird way, I feel better blogging. It feels better to get things off my chest, and sometimes even better to craft it out into a masterpiece known as a blog entry. It works especially well when you're on the verge of getting really irritated having to TALK about it. The thought of OPENING MY MOUTH TO TALK. Agh.

Okay, so I've blogged, when I'm not really supposed to, but at least I NEVER TOUCHED Restaurant City at all, as tempting as it might be. I'm not intending to until after the CTs. It's just a game anyway. Why be so competitive at times? We should learn to take things easier, for games at lest. Okay, I know it sounds kinda ironic coming out from me, someone who's probably the last person to take things easy.

Mugging with Lynette on monday was pretty fun. Haha. It was quite productive, for the fact that we neither got distracted nor distracted each other while mugging that often. Save for the distractions caused by some nuisance people around school. Garh...

You know something? I know it sounds a little silly, but I'm clinging on to this little hope that the holidays would be extended by another week due to this swine flu thing. Apparently, there's this vote online to gather the opinions of the public (mostly students I reckon) on whether the school holidays should be extended. I'm hoping it will. I'm not even done studying yet and the school holidays are already drawing to a close. That's not to say this extension will make a HUGE difference to the grades I'll get for CTs, but still... I want that one week. I can cram in more stuff at least. Still, I won't keep my hopes high until everything's confirmed.

Okay, this entry should come to an end here. Yes, I do feel better now, even though I most probably won't be later. Oh well.

terminal velocity

2009-06-22T08:33:00.001+08:00

Okay, so mugging at the airport on friday turned out to be quite productive. For me, at least. Haha. And besides, there is free music blasting from the overhead speakers of the Macs restaurant where we were studying at, so why not? Haha. :D At least I could study in an environment with songs that I like and not some classic oldies. Sorry... Somehow jazz and all just doesn't click with me. Heh.

Anyway, we had lunch at Popeye's, and if I'm not wrong, it's actually my first time eating there. Heh. Okay, I know skeptics are probably wondering how I even existed in this world without trying Popeye's once for 17 years, but hey, it isn't as popularized as Macs or whatever, so I've got a reason there. Anyway, it's not bad, just that I totally hated what they called a biscuit. Tastes nothing like a biscuit and more like a case of a bad hybrid between a biscuit and a bun. >.<

After that, it was back to mugging at the same place. It got a tad boring, as it usually does anyway, but I managed to pull through. And for those who were wondering, yes, there were photos. Haha, but I'll upload them another time.

Dinner was a rip-off. In the context of the airport, it's kinda expected since their main aim is to maximize profits through ripping the tourists off of their money, which ended up ripping me off too. $4.50 for a plate of Hainanese chicken rice. Can you believe it?! Agh. >.< class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Bleh. Sucks to the core... Anyway, what can I do? Food prices are soaring everywhere, and it's not like the airport is the only place with exorbitant prices. Okay, sounds like an Econs essay, but whatever.

Ok, back to mugging now. I'm in the school library with Lynette. Haha. Such a hardworking girl... Cannot fall behind LOL.

the feast

2009-06-19T09:27:00.002+08:00

Woohoo yesterday's buffet lunch with my family at the Ritz-Carlton was totally rockin' man... Haha. LOLOL. Omg it was quite a sumptuous spread of food. Ok, well it should be since it was Ritz-Carlton. Heh. But at least this time round, the food's better than the previous time I went there. Lol.

Woah I totally ate like some king man. Haha I went for at least 8 rounds of food... AND I HAVE PICTURES OF ALL THE FOOD I ATE! Haha. I shall post it in this entry soon. Can't really upload anything onto my blog since I'm actually at the airport now. Lol.

And I have no idea why, but I was so tired yesterday that I went straight to sleep for about 4 hours, before waking up to work out. Heh I guess gobbling down the excess food made me feel rather guilty. Lol. Totally like a king man.

But yea, it's cool man. I haven't had a buffet for a loooooong time. And the next generation should quickly get married. Haha. I haven't attended a wedding dinner for god knows how long. o.O Haha. It's like this inter-generation pause with no weddings cos everyone's waiting to find their right partners. LOL.

Ok I should get back to mugging, since that is what I set out to do at the airport today. I'm at Macs now (free Internet access woohoo!) with Jarrell. Yee Siang is probably still in bed and Yiks is taking forever to arrive. Heh. Late as usual. -.-

you spin my head right round

2009-06-17T16:09:00.002+08:00

I'm on the verge of ultimate sian-ness. ZZZ. My head is swelling, either from the excessive mugging, or from the lack of proper sleep, or both. Boredom is an understatement to what I'm feeling now, and taking a walk around the school didn't help much. In fact, I think it made it worse with the sweltering heat. What with the weather these few days... Agh.

I hate my life. Garhhh. Now I want to go into the army even more. Heh.

AND I THINK I AM GOING CRAZY. I need to sleep.

mad routine (really)

2009-06-17T14:25:00.000+08:00

Enjoy! :D

a series of unfortunate (and funny) events

2009-06-17T08:23:00.003+08:00

Okay, so yesterday's medical check-up for NS didn't go as bad as I thought it might... I'm relieved, in a way. I left house really early, in the case that I might actually get lost or something, at least I have some buffer time, lest I get a black mark beside my name for being late... Heh.

I was hoping that I wouldn't get lost, but I still did. Sucks. I was supposed to take a bus from Redhill station for about 7 stops or something before I reach the place, but halfway through the bus ride, I got distracted by the TV and lost count of how many bus-stops I had past. I wasn't sure where to alight, since the actual bus-stop didn't even look like it was near some military check-up place. But when I suddenly saw cable cars out of the bus window, I was like "shit, I'm totally in the wrong place". Yepp, I travelled too far until I was somewhere at Harbour Front. Okay, so I took the bus back in the reverse direction, and guess what? I got off 1 stop earlier and I had to walk all the way to where I was supposed to alight. -.- Not exactly a good way to start off a day.

The check-up was pretty time-consuming though, but also because there were many other guys there in the same situation as I was in, so oh well... And gosh, the blood test wasn't as 'scary' or intimidating as everyone was foolishly thinking it would be. It's not like we would be impaled by this gigantic needle and with half of our blood withdrawn or something. It was just a tiny needle and they took out just enough for a blood sample. AND they rubbed alcohol over where we were to be 'impaled' so it wasn't that bad. In fact, I think getting pricked by a needle accidentally would inflict more pain. Hurhur. o.O

And yes, I found the urine test kinda amusing. Everyone was given a small bottle (to pee in obviously) and a litmus paper thing, and there were instructions on the wall on how to conduct the test. Heh. It was funny in the sense that every guy was in the toilet and standing in front of the cubicle, looking at the wall for instructions. Then, after reading the instructions, everyone had a puzzled look on their faces for at least a few seconds, not sure if they had correctly interpreted the instructions. Of course, next comes the peeing, of which everyone got through (duh)... And then comes the confusing part again when everyone was kinda hesitant as to whether we had to wash the bottle or not even after we disposed of our urine. Turns out we didn't have to (I didn't so lucky me)... LOL.

And yes, of course, there is the incident of the bare-bodied guys all in a room. I'm not going to elaborate further, lest I spoil the surprise for the guys who haven't gone for the check-up and for some unknown reason, still haven't heard about this part of the check-up. LOLOL, but it was funny, in a way. Good thing I have a more or less acceptable figure (of which, again, I'm not elaborating) but I feel kinda bad for those who... Yea you get what I mean.

The aptitude assessment test was tiring (3+ hours omg) and kinda monotonous, since it was just facing the computer and answering the questions. I totally sucked at the visualization round as well as the physics round. DUH. I'm an arts student; there's no way I'll get everything right for the physics round, which had many questions on gears, pulleys what not. All of which I remember failing when I was in secondary school. Damn. Okay, at least I know I won't be allocated to some technical vocation or whatever. No quantum physics as 'light-hearted discussion'. Yay... :)

Okay, so it was a day taken off my mugging, but still, let's just say it's a break. Haha. In a way, I kinda wanna enter the army. It's like something you love to hate, but hate to love. Lol. I can't wait for the army actually, but I don't exactly want it to come into my life that quickly. I still NEED to party after the 'A' Levels. Haha... XD

Enough blabbering. I think you are getting bored too. It's back to (yes) studying... ZZZ.

scan.check.pass.

2009-06-15T15:34:00.001+08:00

Damn. Someone in our school contracted the H1N1 flu virus, so our school is stepping up measures to counter the spread of the virus within the school. As a result, a monitoring station has been set up at the entrance of our school gates and everytime we enter or leave the school, we will have to scan our identity cards as a form of record. Oh gosh. All these technicalities... -.- And apparently this person who is down with the virus was in school on friday. Not good. I happen to be in the school library. Bummer. I don't want to get quarantined or something, neither do I want to start getting paranoid, although that's likely to be one of the last things I would do about these kinda situations. Heh.

In a way, I hope that the CTs will be postponed, or even cancelled. Not likely to happen but still... But in a way, I'm hoping for it not to be cancelled, as I would lose the very last opportunity to gauge my level of learning and figure out where I should go from there. YES I DO PREFER TO TAKE THE TESTS. It's odd for this to come out from me, but honestly, I think it's better if I take the CTs, as unprepared as I may be, or I think I may be. I don't know.

I just know I need to get back on mugging. Agh.

we're falling apart to half time

2009-06-15T08:49:00.014+08:00

Third week of holidays and I'm not even halfway done with my mugging. Not good. Not good at all. Oh man... :(

And I hope my arrangements to meet my friends do not fall apart again. One by one (ok this sounds like Harper's Island but whatever...), my arrangements never get fulfilled... Damn.

Yesterday's badminton matches were awesome. Nathan Robertson and Anthony Clark from England totally thrashed the Indonesian team in less than half an hour. And their shots were spectacular man. Definitely beats watching some movies... Haha. And oh gosh, Boonsak Ponsana from Thailand lost to Bao Chunlai from China but I guessed he deserved the win. Still, Ponsana stole the show with all his miraculous saves that totally showed his athletic fitness.

And yes, Harper's Island was much cooler yesterday with the episode named Seep. I wonder how that killer could get away with so many murders. Beth and Mrs Wellington died, resulting in the final body count at 15. Ouch, it certainly isn't nice to get impaled in the back by a pair of pruning shears. >.< Who's next?

Anyway, don't you love these mugshots? Haha.

BODY COUNT OF THE MAIN CHARACTERS IN HARPER'S ISLAND:

roundabout

2009-06-12T14:18:00.000+08:00

I love the Circle Line. It gets me from Marymount to Bishan in about 5 to 10 minutes, and besides, I don't have to walk in the hot sun that makes me sweat like some madman after awhile. Anyway, mugging alone is kinda lonely, but it's more effective at times too. Less distractions, less talking, more self-control, less peer influence. Better in a way, so I'll settle for it.

Anyway, spoiling someone's happiest day isn't exactly the coolest thing to do... It's no wonder the pieces just don't fit together anymore...

I'll get back to studying. Lol.

eh yo where's my technology?

2009-06-12T08:41:00.002+08:00

I need my compter as much as I need my sleep. I snoozed the alarm on my handphone at least 8 times today, and I woke up 1 hour later than I intended to... AND WHY IS THE COMPUTER LAB IN SCHOOL STILL UNDER MAINTENANCE?! I wanna study there, and use the computer there. Maybe I'm biased or whatsoever, but I really prefer the surroundings there. I have no idea why, but the library is just rather intimidating, for some reason. No exactly the environment I desire.

I have no idea why, but since young, I've been rather afraid of crowds. I will walk the extra distance around someplace so as to avoid the next big group of people. I know I have no reason to be scared or whatsoever, but I just don't like the idea of appearing in front of alot of people. Ironic I know, coming from a Street dancer who is on stage like 3 or more times a year... T.T

Anyway, the computer lab under maintenance is probably a sign that I should start concentrating abit more on my work. After all, the major exams are just a few months away. A FEW. But it's not like I get to use my computer at home without all the hassle. Conversely, I have more freedom using the computer in school. MUCH MORE.

RCLF was pretty cool yesterday... I liked the stage they set up at the dining hall. Don't ask me why but I just have a thing for colours. Haha.

Ok, I need to get back to studying, the ultimate reason why I'm even in school in the first place...

slow me down

2009-06-11T08:31:00.002+08:00

I stole some sleep again this morning. Gosh. I think I really need to catch up on sleep whenever I can... I seem to be really deprived on sleep these few days. Even my head is starting to ache from all that lack of sleep in addition to that excessive mugging everyday.

My life is passing me by so quickly. Not good. I'm only at about one-eighth of my mugging, and the second week of holidays is already coming to an end. *sigh* I think my discipline kinda sucks at times too. At least what is restricting me today is that the computer lab has to undergo maintenance, so I won't be checking out Restaurant City on Facebook that often.

Haha anyway, Rachel was super funny yesterday. She created an account for Restaurant City as well JUST because she liked the message board. LOLOL. Anyway I get some of my ingredients so all right... Haha.

By the way, I found this new website where you can watch videos FOR FREE! Haha. Thanks Meng Xia! Yepp, I shall rely on that then.

Anyway, I think I should be getting back on mugging. I can't afford to slow down my life. I'll fall behind. And given my intelligence level (or the lack of it), I will just dissolve or something.

Ok ok, back to mugging... Damn.

snooze

2009-06-10T11:05:00.002+08:00

Damn. I love and hate the person who invented the 'snooze' button for handphone alarm clocks. It gives me extra sleep with the hit of a button, but it only entices me to hitting that annoying button over and over again just to steal a couple more minutes of sleep. Sometimes I even snooze the alarm so may times that my handphone just decided to stop ringing, so that I will have to force myself out of that comfy bed.

These few days are so damn hot at night that I tend to wake up within a few rings. Mind you, I don't have an air-con (a working one at least) in my home... :( Flipping around in bed in the middle of the night searching for the coolest spot isn't exactly the coolest thing to do either. It gets on my nerves at times, but what the heck, I need my sleep.

Anyway, another day = another day for mugging + a little bit of Restaurant City. Oh gosh. I see my really interesting day ahead welcoming me to embrace it with open arms. -.- *yawns*

pain in the throat

2009-06-09T12:46:00.002+08:00

Gosh. My throat really hurts. I have no idea why but there is this sharp pain right in the middle of my throat, so much that it actually hurts to swallow down my saliva. >.< Ouch.

I'm kinda bored studying in the computer lab again, but for some reason I'm not exactly very keen on studying at home. I kinda prefer studying with friends. And albeit getting distracted sometimes by the computer (Restaurant City is damn fun!), I prefer the environment here.

Besides, there's air-con, for which I'm grateful for since the air-cons in my house all broke down several years ago and nobody bothered to fix or replace them. It's scary how the weather is nowadays. Just one minute out of the fan and I'll be drenched in sweat. Heh.

Ok ok, back to mugging. And a bit of Restaurant City. Haha. -oops-

gaming tendencies

2009-06-09T10:07:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was productive for mugging, albeit I have to admit that I got a bit distracted by this new (ok maybe not new) game on Facebook called Restaurant City. Hurhur. XD It is pretty addictive, even though the characters' actions are kinda eccentric at times. Haha.

And it was pretty funny, as Yiks, Wee Kien, Sabina and I were all playing the game at the same time at the computer lab, and shouting across the room to trade ingredients. Haha. That was a little weird but cool. Reminds me of those kinda weekend markets you see on travel documentaries. Only this one is a localized virtual version... Haha.

Why didn't I discover this game sooner? But... I'm getting distracted. Damn.

soaking in the great singapore sale

2009-06-09T09:55:00.002+08:00

Hehe. I went out shopping with my mum on sunday at orchard (ok mainly she was there to help me settle my bills haha). Wootz. Haha I love shopping man. This has got to be one of the most productive shopping trips ever. I got myself a belt and a pair of shorts from 77th Street (the very last day of offer -- 30% off all apparels and 15% off all accessories!) and a pair of white-and-orange basketball shorts. Haha. :D

I've been waiting so long to get all these, and I so happen to find all of them in just one shopping trip. Lol.

And I know what I want to wear for my prom already. :D

mugging in the heartlands

2009-06-09T09:15:00.004+08:00

Woodlands turned out to be a pretty great place for mugging. I was there mugging with Zhi Wei and it was productive indeed. Haha. I didn't get distracted much except for the heat coming in from the huge window where we were sitting... o.O But anyway, that didn't prove to be too much of a bother, since the thought of CTs approaching is always in my mind... There's really not much time left, and there's still so much more to mug. Gosh. I think I'm falling behind.

Final Destination 4 trailer is finally out! :D

2009-06-08T09:56:00.001+08:00

Awesome! Cool stuff! I can't wait to watch it man OMG! :D -excited-

there's never a right time to say goodbye

2009-06-05T08:38:00.011+08:00

*sigh* Time seems to pass by so quickly when you are at the peak of your fun... It's kinda weird to have to 'formally' leave Street, a CCA I've been so attached to despite its short journey over 1 and a half year. It's weird that after school, nowadays, I pretty much have nowhere else to go. After all, my life in school pretty much revolved around my class and Street. Now that Street is no longer something that I go to, but crash, it feels kinda weird.

And it's weird to have stepped down. I kinda miss that little bit of authority that I had to collect funds and mark attendance, even though it isn't exactly the most enjoyable thing in the world. Still, it serves as what I remember from Street 10 years down the road. But of course, it's not just that. It's the friends you make, and the times that you have shared together. Laughing together at all the silly things, doing all the stupidest things you otherwise would never have done, or just hanging out together as the friendship bond mysteriously grows deeper.

I hate 'goodbyes'... It always signals the physical end of something, even though we always say that friendships will last through time no matter what. I know the bonds are bound to get a little distanced with time, but I trust the friendships that I have forged with my Street friends. I know that time will never be a factor in destroying what we have built over such a short period.

I really enjoyed farewell, especially the video which the J1s had painstakingly made for us. It seemed like we have come such a long way, yet I don't wish for this to end just like that. But ultimately I guess I have to get back on my studies, which is unfortunately my primary objective in a school. Sucks huh?

The photos I have in my memory card will forever serve as part of the beautiful memories I've had in Street. I never thought I could be a dancer, yet I got SO MUCH MORE from my whole journey in Street. I can't be more grateful to the friends who have changed my life as well. Thank you all. :)